An Imprint Story
by BlackBirdPie
Summary: The story of Leah and Sam's relationship; tragic as it may be. And a certain imprint which ruined everything... M for the later chapters.
1. Title Page

**A****N ****I****MPRINT ****S****TORY**

_I finally made it._

_I made a clean getaway._

_And I miss you,_

_I miss you every single day._

_**-Maria Taylor "Clean Getaway"**_

_But O, how bitter a thing it is to look into happiness through another man's eyes. _

_**-William Shakespeare **_

_For those days we felt like a mistake,_

_Those times when love's what you hate_

_Somehow_

_We keep marchin' on_

_**-OneRepublic "Marchin' On"**_


	2. Chapter One

**Well, I'm starting a new chaptered fic. This time around it's about Leah and Sam, and my version of what happened pre-Emily, mid-Emily, and some post BD epilogue-y action. I know, pretty epic. But SPOILER this ends the same as it does in the books...sooo you've been warned.  
>Let me know what ya'll think; if I should continue publishing chapters and whatnot. <strong>

**I don't own any of this, all SMeyer, but if I did, then a certain Ms. Young would probably never have been born..**

**Chapter One**

"Hush." He whispered to her, covering her giggling mouth with one of his hands. "Please Leah, or your parents will hear us." But he couldn't hold back the smile covering his own face.

"Oh Sam, you worry too much." She gently bit down on his finger, smiling.

"Not too much, only about _some _things, like your dad busting in here and shooting my ass."  
>"Uh, my dad? I think you should be more worried about my mom."<p>

And he couldn't disagree with her about that one.

"I should go." He said, reaching like he was going to pull his shirt back on.

"Go? Nothing even happened." She pouted, looking disappointed. "This whole 'virtue' shit is really getting out of hand…"

He smiled again, interrupting her "Your too young, and I'm older then you, meaning wiser, so maybe you should think about listening to me just this once."

"Too young?" Leah sounded outraged. "We have been going out for two years, and your only two years older then me, so while I was born you were still crapping your pants, O' Wise One." She rolled her eyes sarcastically.

Sam leaned down to kiss her again.

"Please don't go." And she looked at him.

And Sam knew he would stay, because of that look she would no doubt have in her eyes. The one he loved her for, the one only he got to see. The one, when Leah was not being sarcastic and funny, when she was just Leah. Of course he loved her for the other parts too, but this…_look_…was her core, this was who she was.

"Only for a little while longer then, alright?"

"No, but fine. I know you have to go running off to your other lady friend, the one whose age has been deemed _appropriate _for screwing…"

Sam only sighed. "All in good time Lee-lee." Then added as a side thought, "And you know I don't have another 'lady friend'." He snorted, as if the thought was ridiculous.

"Well if you did…"

"I wouldn't." He interjected.

"She would be older then me, no doubt." Leah finished as if he hadn't said anything. "And of 'screwing age'."

Sam sighed, again, and Leah smiled.

"What am I going to do with you?"

"Well, I do have _some _ideas, now that you mention it…"

"Leah," Sam said sternly. "While we _have _been dating for two years, you're only a sophomore…" Leah gave him a look, and Sam corrected himself. "Almost a junior, I know, but _still_ a sophomore"

Leah waved her hand, as if this didn't matter to her. Then changed her tactic altogether, rolling Sam over so she was straddling him. She leaned down to whisper in his ear, letting her hair tickle his face in a way she knew would drive him crazy.

"Do I seem older now?" Her voice was low, and Sam moaned, Leah grinned triumphantly.

"You, are going to kill me." He cupped her face in his hands fondly and kissed her nose.

Leah smiled before her face got serious. She looked up, then in the direction of her door. Sam stopped breathing for a minute and they both listened.

"False alarm." She said happily, rolling back on her side to lean into Sam more.

"Go to sleep Leah." He whispered, leaning his head into her hair.

She mumbled something, but otherwise seemed to comply.

Sam shut his own eyes, planning on going out through her window after she had fallen asleep, knowing, with full certainty, who he would be holding in his arms for the rest of his life.


	3. Chapter Two

**Here's another chapter, let me know whatcha thinking.**

**Chapter Two**

Sam remembered the day he had met Leah Clearwater. Well, technically he had met her before that, but it was _that _day that he really saw her.

Her truck was pulled off on the side of the road, and he heard her before he saw her.

"Fuck, fuck, _fuck_." He heard someone say, or yell would be more appropriate.

Sam pulled over, and saw smoke rolling out from under the hood of the vehicle, he guessed that the thing had overheated.

"Hello?" He said, sounding unsure.

"God mother_fucking_ damn it."

"Hello?" He said again, sounding even more unsure.

Leah came around the side of the truck and kicked the tire, looking supremely pissed off.

Sam was surprised that it was such a _young_ person, and a girl, with that bad of a mouth. In fact, he was surprised she was old enough to drive.

She looked up and saw him, and stopped in her tracks, Sam thought that she might be embarrassed that she had heard him, but that didn't appear to be the case, or if he was honest about his self flattery, nervous to see an older boy.

"Well, can you help, or are you going to stand there and gape at me?" She threw her hair out of her face, still looking annoyed.

"What's the problem?"

"I have trouble expressing my emotions in a productive way." She said, taking on the voice of a "typical teenage girl".

"Huh?" He looked at her confused.

"Well what a stupid question!" She said, throwing her hands in the air. "Obviously my car is the problem, and if I _knew _what _that _was then I wouldn't be talking to _you_."

Sam grinned at her, which seemed to throw Leah off.

"Well then your lucky I pulled over, since I'm a mechanic."

"And I'm a Leo." She said in a deadpan voice, but there was something a little more kind on her face, and the corner of her mouth was turned up.

The next four hours Sam would spend trying to fix her truck while she sat happily perched on his next to her own.

He found out that she was in fact _not _old enough to drive, that her father didn't know she had his truck and that Sam had by seven o'clock to finish fixing it and getting it back in the garage before she got her head cut off.

"Dad doesn't want you to borrow his things?" Sam asked, poking his head out to ask her.

"No, but I'm more worried about my mom's reaction." Leah grimaced.

He also found out that she had "borrowed" the truck in order to prove her brother wrong, since he said she couldn't drive it. And that it had overheated since she had tried to make the ancient thing go eighty-five.

"He appears to be right." Sam had told her, then got hit in the head with an apple core, from an apple she had found while rummaging around in _his_ truck.

At six-thirty that night, they pulled the truck into the garage, and snuck into the house.

There was a kid on the couch, watching some cartoon on television. Leah chucked the remote at him, "Hey dipshit." She said. "I drove the truck just fine. You can even ask Sam, he saw me." Leah glared at him in a you-do-not-want-to-mess-this-up sort of way and he just nodded.

"Oh." Seth said, sounding disappointed. And he handed Leah a crumpled dollar bill.

She smiled triumphantly, and pocketed it.

Thirty minutes later, after all three of them were in the kitchen eating something Leah had warmed up from dinner last night, the Clearwater parents came through the back door. By that point Sam had no idea what he was doing there.

"Hey." Seth said through a mouth of food.

"How was Billy?" Leah asked at the same time.

"Fine, fine. He was good, said to say hello to you two." Harry said, hanging his coat up, not yet noticing Sam sitting at the table.

"And how was your walk over there?" Leah asked, smiling at Seth, which was the first time Sam had seen he do that, and Seth smiled back.

"Long." Harry said, without emotion.

"It was nice, it's a nice evening." Sue said, sounding sure. "Harry, its good for you to walk since you retired you're…well a walk's good for you alright? You don't want health problems." Then Sue, for the first time, looked up. "What are you doing here?" Sue asked, noticing the junior boy she knew to be Sam Uley sitting close to her daughter.

"Hello…ma'm." He added the ma'm as an afterthought.

Sue was about to open her mouth to say something else before Leah interrupted her. "We have a date on Friday Mom, it's no big deal, actually, he was just leaving."

Sam stopped, with fork midair, and agreed to this.

They both abruptly stood up and Leah walked him out to his truck.

"I didn't know we had a date." Sam remarked, smiling as they got to the vehicle.

"Well," Leah started. "I didn't think you were going to work it up to ask me, so I thought I would do it in the most non-humiliating way for you. Consider it payment for fixing the truck." She added the last part in a whisper.

"You know I'm older then you." Sam didn't know why he reminded her, because if she changed her mind, he was pretty sure he would be over here everyday, trying to change it back.

"Yeah, I guess you just got lucky." She smiled, and went back into the house, yelling behind her. "Pick me up at seven-thirty."

And Sam knew, from that point on, that one day he would love Leah Clearwater.


	4. Chapter Three

**I KNOW, TWO CHAPTERS IN ONE DAY! Haha, all two of you must be pretty excited. :)**

**Chapter Three**

He got the call while he was at the garage. It was just an average day. Was.

It was Sue calling him, so that was when he knew something was up, and about Leah, since it was Sue, and something really bad, because she hardly looked at him none the less _talked_ to him while he was at her house. But he couldn't blame her for not liking her now junior daughter dating someone who had already graduated from high school. But, if she had asked, he would have most happily told her he was waiting to apply to the community college closest to the college Leah would apply to, as soon as _she _graduated. But she never asked, and Sam decided it was something he could only tell her if she wanted to hear it.

"Sam." She said sounding unsure. "It's Leah, there was an accident…"

"What? Is she alright? What happened?" He actually had to sit down.

"She's going to be fine the doctors think. Harry's with her at the hospital now, she was driving the car, and, well I'm not completely sure what happened but it ended with her crashing into the Quilman's house…"

"She's at the hospital?" He asked, Sam only waited for her confirmation before jumping in his truck and driving at a speed that would put even Leah to shame, straight to the hospital.

It felt like it took longer than it should have for him to see her, he had to get Harry's consent to go back, since he wasn't family, he ended up finding her however, because of the swearing.

"Well, I don't _need_ a fucking machine to tell me if my heart is beating, when I turn _blue _and tip over, know it's not going too well, alright?"

There was an unimpressed looking nurse in the corner who mumbled something that he could only assume _wasn't _a compliment, and left without a fight.

"Lee-lee?" He asked her sounding unsure, like she would disappear at any minute.

She looked at him, her left arm was broken, and she had a black eye and cracked lip. Her mouth quivered for a second then she started to cry.

Sam had probably seen her cry a total of two times in all the time he had known her, it just wasn't something that Leah did.

"Leah, honey, what's the matter? What's wrong?" He went over to her bed, and sat down next to her, trying to comfort without jostling, not wanting to make anything worse.

"I…I just hit his _house_. I could have killed someone Sam. I could have killed him. It was an accident. I took my eyes off the road because I thought I saw something running on to it, like a deer, and then went around the corner too fast…" She let out another sob.

"Shhh. Lee-lee, it's going to be alright. Shhh, don't cry, honey. It's going to be fine. I know it was an accident but everything's okay now." _You're okay now._

While Leah put on a tough front, she was actually the most compassionate person Sam knew, she didn't want to hurt anyone and he knew she would take this hard. Especially since the whole Rez would talk about it, Leah was not known for her excellent driving.

"They'll say I did it on purpose." She whispered, voicing his own thoughts, even though he knew it wasn't true, some would think that, and it made him angry, raging, killing angry, that people would think that about Leah, that she thought it would be funny.

"You didn't, Leah, I know that." He hugged her a little tighter.

She sighed, and seemed to be temporary placated. Sam knew this was probably the last he would hear her feelings about this, she never opened up twice.

"What would I do without you?"

"You won't have to find out." He promised her, kissing her one last time on the head.


	5. Chapter Four

**New chapter, and the Review Whore in me is standing on a street corner wild-eyed, and desperately waving her arms at cars to stop by [hint, hint]. And, can ya catch the blatant/foreshadowing-y vampire joke. HA. Ha. Ha...**

**Chapter Four**

It had been a couple of weeks since the accident, and she didn't want to talk about it, Sam got glared at the two times he had tried to bring it up, and it was the end of that discussion.

Leah's injuries had healed quickly, and the last thing she said on the matter was "You're being retarded."

He just told her she was being politically incorrect and that was that.

The only person who had successfully been able to mention 'that day' was Harry, and it was only to mildly chastise Leah.

"I thought you were going to give me a heart attack." He told her, trying to sound gruff, but had his eyes crinkled.

"You were clutching your chest, Harry." Sue reprimanded, indicating she thought he should get it checked out.

"Ah, it was only a touch of heartburn. Probably from…" He looked at his wife's face and stopped. "…not your cooking. Anyway, all I need is some Pepto-Bismol. The heartburn's been acting up since then." He pounded on his chest, and ended up coughing.

Leah only shook her head and smiled at Sam. He dad's mild demeanor always allowed him to get away with more from Leah then anyone else.

But, now, Leah decided she had bigger things to worry about, like prom. Which was coming up in two weeks. What Leah was worrying about was not the dress, or shoes or the rest of that "pointless shit", but how she was going to get out of going with Sam, who was adamant about her going.

"Is it the free punch?" She asked him. "Because I could get a giant bowl, head down to the 7-11 for some Hawaiian Tropic, and we could take care of that right now."

He told her no, it was not about the punch, but that he didn't want her to miss out on anything because she was dating someone who graduated from high school.

Leah only informed him that there was only _one thing _she was missing out on that she minded, and everyone else was doing it. Literally.

She had not-so-subtly broached this topic before, the whole no-sex thing, but he was not budging. No matter how hard she pushed him too.

"You're cold." She mumbled to him.

"Yeah, I'm a cold one." He said, smiling proudly of himself. She only flipped him off, not in the mood for tribal-legend puns at the moment.

"Seriously Lee-lee, what is the worst that will happen?"

"On the way there we will get hit and killed by drunk teenage drivers just leaving the prom." She answered without missing a beat. "Your only point for me going is that you don't want me to miss out, well, I wouldn't go anyway, so _really_ you're causing me to detour off the natural path of my life."

"Ah, c'mon Leah, stop being such a harpy and just go to the friggin' prom with him." Seth said as he came into the kitchen to get something more to eat.

"I have three problems with what you just said, one you are not 'cool' or 'mature' or 'badass' or whatever the hell it is that you're going for by using the word 'friggin' in every _fucking _sentence.

"Second, it none of your goddamn mother_fucking _business.

"And third of all a _harpy_? Really? That was necessary Seth? Because I am going to remember that one."

Seth looked at Sam out of the corner of his eye. "Good luck dude." Then mumbled under his breath when he left the room.

"_What _did he just say?" Leah asked, standing up like she was about to go after him.

"I'm pretty sure he said 'diggin Sharpies'. As in the marker. And you know I really like them myself."

"Well excellent, maybe I will use one to write 'SAM IS A LYING DOUCHELORD' on your forehead." She paused and smiled at the thought. "Then I would go to prom with you."

"You already have a dress Lee-lee, and shoes, we wouldn't be there long anyway."

"Then what's the point of _going_?" She asked, throwing her arms in the air like she normally did to stress a point.

"I would be there." Sam said hopefully, smiling, and pointing at himself.

Leah did her best not to smile, but her eyes had lost their ferocity and the corners of her lips looked like they were unwillingly being pulled up.

"But prom is…expensive, I don't want you to waste your money on it."

"Leah." Sam said, sounding stern. They had been over this one before, Sam often had difficulties with Leah not letting him pay for things. Leah only cited feminism quotes whenever he brought it up.

"Well in the words of Susan B. Anthony…"

"Right, right, you're here, you have ovaries and you're proud of it."

"I think I am offended by that, so much that I will not be speaking to you on…Saturday May twenty-first." She said, glancing at the calendar.

"I wonder what's happening _that _day." Sam said, rolling his eyes.

Leah squinted at him, Sam was suddenly apprehensive because she pulled her pirate face, which meant nothing good for him. "Fine. We can go to prom, and I will have the typical prom experience. Alright?"

"Okay…"

"Which means…we will be having sex!" She said, clapping her hands, looking fairly pleased with herself for coming up with this win-win situation. Either she was going to have sex with Sam or she was going to get to skip out on prom.

"Leah, not everybody has sex on prom night. And you're going to be in that particular category."

"Every prom movie and television show _featuring _prom, disagrees with you on that point." She said.

Sam sighed, wondering how many times they could have this fight.

"Listen," She continued. "Either we can go to prom, and third base, or we can stay home and watch movies."

"Fine." Sam said, somewhat curtly. "Then I guess we are staying home."

"Oh." Leah said, sounding a little disappointed. "Fine then. Be an asshole."

"And how exactly am I being an _asshole_? Is it the me protecting your virtue, or trying to get you to go to prom so you don't regret anything."

"It's the you refusing to have sex with your perfectly old enough girlfriend. And refusing to compromise because you want your own way."

"Oh yeah." He said sarcastically. "I'm the one with problems not getting my own way."

"Yeah, you are. You know what Sam, fine whatever, we will do it your way, but at least man up and _admit_ that it's not my 'virtue' or whatever bullshit you are trying to protect but that it's…" Leah stopped short, looking a little surprised about her outburst.

"About what?" Sam asked, knowing it must be something about her feelings, and something she had been feeling a while, if she was so shy about saying it.

"Thatyoudon''tbeanygoodatit." She said, in one breath.

It took Sam a minute a make sense what she was saying. "What?"

"Look, Sam, I'm not stupid and I know about your track record, or whatever, and it's not that I care that you were with other girls before me but if that's _ your _reason for putting it off then at least have the common courtesy to admit it." She ended with a nod.

"_What_?" Sam looked confused.

"_What_, what?" And with Sam's confusion, Leah in turn started looking less sure.

Sam could only stare at her, not even thinking of what he should say.

"Well for god sakes, _say _something! Stop looking at me like an idiot."

"I'm obviously not the idiot. You think we are waiting so…that…I can enjoy myself more?"

Leah looked a little hurt. "Well, it's not that ridiculous. I know you have been with a lot of girls, and I haven't. With guys, I mean. Or well I guess girls for that matter…but that's not the point…"

"No," he interrupted her. "The point is you have serious mental issues."

"About which point?"

"All of them!" He yelled, exasperated. "Believe it or not, we really are waiting because you are too young."

"But you were a lot younger…" She began to point out.

"And it was a mistake." Sam said, sounding sure. "Which isn't one we are going to repeat. I don't want you to regret it Leah. Okay?"

Leah had known, as well as the entire school, about Sam's reputation. It's not that he was the "love them then leave them" sort. Girls just sort of threw themselves at him, and didn't turn them away.

"Are you planning on leaving me?" Leah asked, shocking Sam slightly.

"No."

"Well then, I won't regret it. We are going to end up old and gray together Sam Uley, and I just want to enjoy it for as long as I can." She smiled, and slipped an arm around his neck.

He smiled, because he realized she has just totally won this 'prom' one, and that they weren't going.

Leah leaned up and kissed Sam, and he pulled her closer to him. They were together, and everything was perfect.


	6. Chapter Five

**And this chapter, is why I decided to rate it with a M, haha...**

**Chapter Five**

It was Leah's last day of her Senior year. She had exactly two hours and seventeen minutes to go before she was free from school. It felt like, to her, the beginning of her and Sam's life together.

Since she was no longer the "high school student" and him the pedophile, as she so lovingly called him, and it was technically legal and all that.

Sam was waiting for her in front of the school when the final bell rang at long last.

"Congratulations." He said when he saw her coming.

"Right, let's get out of here."

The drove to her house before Sam picked up conversation again. Leah was trying, without avail, to find a good radio station.

"Are you excited for your party tonight?" He asked her, smiling, waiting for her reply, which he already knew what it would be.

And she didn't disappoint. Leah pulled a face. "I don't fucking think so. It was my mom's idea, and I wasn't about to go to the mat over this one. But are_ you_ excited?" She asked, with a now wicked grin.

"Are you sure…" He started to ask before she cut him off.

"I have been waiting for four long years now, you said after graduation, you made a _pinky _promise, sorry budd-o but it's happening. Actually my imminent de-flowering is what will keep my smiling all through the stupid party. Especially since my parents are leaving to go to Seattle right after it. And Seth's going to a friends house. It just worked out perfectly."

"Do you know why your parents are going to Seattle?" Sam asked as he took the left into the Clearwater's driveway, and trying to change the subject.

Leah smiled at what he was doing. "Nope." She said, popping the p. "They won't say." Leah was humming along to the radio.

And then Sam couldn't help but smiling at how happy Leah was, even though the reason was not one he liked to consider.

Leah opened the door and made like she was going to get out of it, but Sam didn't move.

"What are you doing?" She asked him, looking confused, and like she was trying to figure out what he was up to.

"Nothing, I'll just meet you inside."

"Seriously Sam, you're a lousy liar, what are you doing."

"I…don't think it's any of your concern."

Leah squinted at him, the grinned a little. "Did you get me something? Are you trying to hide a graduation present in here?"

Sam tried his best not to look guilty. "Oh Leah, whatever, I just have something to take care of, then I will meet you inside. Alright?"

"Fine, but you're totally busted."

Sam checked, after he saw Leah walk slowly in to the house, looking back at the car four times, on the little package in back, it was still there, and nothing had happened to it.

Sam jogged into the house, the kitchen was in chaos. Leah was sitting grumpily at the table, making some sort of appetizer with Seth, who also didn't look so pleased.

"Christ Leah, you think this could be made more of a big deal?" He mumbled.

"It wasn't exactly my idea." She hissed under her breath.

Sue was at the sink, looking out into the side yard where Harry, and a couple of his buddies were tying up some streamers and setting up the folding tables.

"Harry!" Sue yelled through the window. "Harry, not so close to the tree, I don't want birds…" She searched for the right word. "…making a mess on the tables. No, no not the left! To the right! Yes the RIGHT Harry, it can't be on a slope!" She shook her head and went over to the stove where something was baking.

"Oh Sam!" She said smiling, Sue seemed to have finally gotten over her strong dislike for Sam, probably because he was polite and always offered to do dishes when he stayed over for dinner, which was about three nights a week. " I didn't see you there. How've you been?"

"Fine, good. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Well, Harry could probably use it, god knows." She said, not looking amused.

"Alright." Sam said, smiling at Leah, who was too busy stabbing her current appetizer piece with a knife.

"And Leah," Sam heard Sue saying as he left the kitchen to go help Harry. "Emily called, they won't be able to make it, something about work? But she said how sorry she was."

"Well that sucks." Leah said, sounding sincerely disappointed. "I really wanted to introduce her to Sam."

"You'll get the chance later I'm sure." Sue said. "Seth! I swear, if you eat another one of those I'm going to kill you. We need enough for the guests!"

The party was over in five hours and twelve minutes, or so Leah told him.

They had managed to clean everything up so that Leah's parents could leave for Seattle that night. Sam had honestly never seen Leah move so fast or clean so efficiently. Usually her cleaning consisted of trying to make Seth do it all for her.

But even Sue was having a hard time keeping up.

"Come on Dad!" She would yell. "How long does it take to take down a damn streamer?"

Every time Seth stopped, or tried to take a break, she would whap him on the back of the head. "Get moving." Leah would command.

Sam would have probably found it a little more entertaining, except that he was finding himself nervous for tonight. He didn't know if Leah was ready, and he didn't want her to regret anything.

"Sam, maybe you should sit down, you're looking a little pale." Sue at one point suggested.

"Sit down?" Leah asked outraged. "There's still dishes to be dried."

But at last, everything was clean, and her parents left, taking Seth with them to drop of on their way out of town.

The Clearwaters didn't say anything to Sam, or to Leah, about him staying over, but Sue did eye him on their way out.

"Behave." Was all she said, looking at both of them,

"Right." Leah answered, shutting the door in their face.

She turned around after she shut the door, and leaned her back against it, keeping her hand on the knob.

"Finally." She said. "So…what do you want to do now?"

"A rousing game of Monopoly?" Sam suggested.

"Or not." Leah said snorting. "Why don't we go to my room so you can give me the thing you _ don't _ have in your truck? Alright?"

Sam grinned. "Okay, I'll meet you up there."

By the time Sam got up to her room Leah was sitting on the bed counting out her money, she had changed into her pajama shorts, and a loose tank top, that also happened to be her lowest. The shorts were gray and soft from how many times she had worn them.

"Hey." She said, smiling at him as he came in the door. There was something about her face, he noticed, that looked shy. "Well, I did pretty good." She said, indicating at the money, she picked it all up and put it in an envelope, which she then put under her bed. She patted the spot next to her, and Sam sat down.

"Okay," He said, handing her the package. "Before you open it, just let me explain…" But he didn't even get to finish his sentence before Leah had ripped into it and had the lid off.

"Oh, Sam." She said, looking up. "It's…"  
>"My grandmothers." He finished for her. "It was hers and she gave it to my mom to pass on…and I wanted you to have it."<p>

Leah fingered the gold wolf face that made up the charm of the necklace.

"It's beautiful." Leah said, she wasn't weepy, or teary eyed, she just looked…sure.

"The wolf means 'protector', and I wanted to give it to you, like a promise. Because I promise you Lee-lee, I swear I won't ever do anything to hurt you."

Leah took the clasp and hooked it behind her neck.

"It look's good, doesn't it?" She said, smiling.

Instead of answering her Sam leaned in and kissed her.

Leah leaned further back on the bed, so she was laying down, and pulled Sam with her. His tongue brushed the bottom of her lip and he felt her shiver.

She was pressing herself to Sam like he was the only thing that would keep them alive. Soon she had shed off her tank top and his shirt. Sam's hands spanned her back, pulling her even closer.

His hands moved up her chest, rolling and kneading as they went, eliciting a moan from Leah.

She moved to kissing his collarbone, he had a birthmark on his left shoulder that was best seen at this angle. Sam grabbed her leg, stroking her calf and down to her ankle, then hitched it around his waste. His hand slid up her leg until he was toying with the hem of her shorts.

Leah stopped to look him in the eyes. She lifted one of her eyebrows, as if to say _Well?_

But he had to be sure. "Leah, you're positive, that you want to…"

Leah rolled her eyes. "Of course. I'm sure. It's you, only you and all you, so of course I am sure you moron."

Sam smiled, and she slid off his own pants.

Leah was surprised at the spasm of pain she felt as he entered her. Sam saw it on her face and stopped moving.

"Lee-lee," He whispered putting his forehead on hers. "Honey, are you alright, I'm not hurting you?"

Leah only nodded, surprised again, and more embarrassed this time, to find her eyes filled with tears. "I'm fine." And she hated how small her voice sounded.

Sam caught one of her tears with his finger.

"We can stop…" He suggested looking worried.

She shook her head. "No." She said fiercely. And Sam cracked a grin.

Sam started to move slowly in and out of her, and the pain lessened, until it was almost gone.

"Sam." She croaked.

His face was covered in sweat. "Are…you…alright?" He managed to get out.

She nodded her head quickly, and pulled him further in. It was a new pain she was feeling.

"Oh, fuck, Sam…faster…" Her eyes flapped back as he started to go in and out quicker. She started to meet his thrusts with her own. And groaned with her release.

They both collapsed on the bed.

"Lee-lee?" Sam said, quietly, tracing the outline of her nose in the darkness.

"Yeah?" She asked, smiling, rolling over to look at him.

"I love you."

She smiled again at him. "I know."


	7. Chapter Six

**Something wolfy this way comes!**

**Chapter Six**

When Leah woke up the next morning it was really hot.

She remembered what had happened last night and couldn't help but smiling.

God, it really was hot in here, Leah couldn't help but thinking.

But no, she realized, it wasn't the _room_ that was hot, it was Sam. And he was burning. His arm was slung over her, and he was snoring lightly.

"Hey." She whispered. "Sam, hey _Sam_, wake up." She nudged him awake.

He jumped. "Hi." He sounded groggy and his voice was really hoarse. He looked confused.

"Are you feeling alright?" Leah asked, he noticed the worry in her tone. "You're really warm."

And no, he didn't feel alright. His muscles were aching, he guessed it _could_ have been from last night, but they really hurt. And his throat hurt, and his head. And he felt like he had a high fever.

"I don't know. I feel…strange. I think I should go." He stood up and began putting his clothes on, but then looked at Leah on the bed, with the cover pulled up to her chin. She looked…so young.

"Hey." He said, touching her chin. "I'm sorry, but I don't want you to get sick, okay? Lee-lee, I will call you tomorrow I promise. Okay?"

She smiled at him. "Alright. Do you want me to drive you home?"

"Nah, I can manage, I'll call you though. Because you're not…you feel okay about last night still?"

Leah rolled her eyes. "I would feel better if it was happening tonight." She smiled.

"Call me when you get home, okay? You don't look so good."

"I'll be fine. Love you Lee-lee."

"Love you, Sam."

Sam never called Leah that night, or the next one, or the next one.

Leah finally gave up and called him.

The phone rang twice before Sam's mother answered it. "Hello?" She sounded a little anxious.

"Hey, Mrs. Uley." Leah said, twining the necklace around her fingers. "Is um, is Sam feeling better? He never called and I was worried…"

"You mean he isn't there?" Mrs. Uley said, sounding even more worried. "I thought he was with you."

"No." Leah grabbed on to the table next to her. Seth looked up at her funny from where he was watching television. She felt the blood draining from her face. "He left my house two days ago, he said he was feeling sick and was going home…I thought…I thought he was too sick to call…"

It took twenty minutes before Leah and Sam's mother were at the Rez's police department.

Leah was talking to one of the officers about when she had last seen him, what was he wearing, what was he driving and so on. His mother had brought along a photo and copies of it were already being ran.

"Morris here," One of the officers radio in. "Yes sir, yes Chief Swan, it looks like there's a missing person, twenty year old male, maybe the people on your end…"

Search groups were being assembled, and told to look for a dark green ford truck. Leah's head was spinning and she thought she was going to be sick.

Little did anyone know that Sam Uley was about twenty miles away in the woods, his whole body was shuddering, and he felt like he was being ripped apart from the inside out, his muscles were being pulled apart he couldn't control his body.

Some howl noise escaped through his mouth and he exploded, he thought he was dying.

Then he was up, standing taller then he normally did. Sam looked around, seeing fur, and a tail and paws. He howled a cry and began to run.

He didn't stop running until he heard voices. His head snapped around, he didn't see anybody, but he did hear someone. _Leah_?

_"He was wearing jeans, yeah kind of faded I guess, and a gray sweatshirt. Yeah he has long hair, pulled back at his neck. I don't know, a little over 5'10" I think…"_

He could hear her through the building. Sam cried again and turned around to run.

He was a _monster_. He couldn't, no shouldn't, be around people, especially Leah. He would hurt someone, he was sure. Sam ran until his muscles gave out.

He collapsed on the ground, and his body began to shudder again.

This time was to opposite of last, it was like his…his _fur_…was trying to turn in, all of his muscle, bone, tendon, was contracting, his wolf form was howling, until the howl turned into a scream, and he was man again. Sam stood up, touching his own chest.

_What's happening to me? _He thought desperately.

Sam spent the next twelve days, turning from one form to another, alone in to woods, sure, that this time, was it, this time he wasn't going to turn, this time he was going to die.

Leah spent the next twelve days, with Mrs. Uley and the rest of the police force looking for Sam. Only after about a week the police stopped looking, they found his truck, they said it looked like a runaway. But Leah knew better, he wouldn't leave her, not if he had a choice. She kept putting up posters. Every time the phone rang Leah was sure, that this was it, this was the time, it was someone calling to say they found him, and he was…dead.

But by the end of the two weeks Sam could control his transformations, for the most part. He ran closer to his house on the thirteenth day, and then turned back to man. He waited it out, and was able to stay in that form for a whole day, and he made a plan.

He didn't know exactly what to do, but he was going to break into his house for some clothes, then go from there. His mother shouldn't be home, she should be working.

Sam found the spare key under the mat, and opened the door, he had put on some clothes and almost made it out his room door, which adjoined off the front room, before someone went "_Sam_?" He turned to the left and saw his mother looking shocked.

"Where have you been, we have been so worried, me and Leah…" Sam winced when he heard her name. He had left after they had…for the first time…then disappeared for the next two weeks. He felt like shit.

"I'm sorry." He said lamely. But he had to get out of there before he changed.

"_Sorry_? Where have you been?" Her voice was getting higher and louder.

"Mom, I can't…"

"Can't tell me?" She finished for him, he nodded his head. Swearing at himself for not getting a place of his own. "Try again. You tell me just exactly where the hell you have been…and why you are so much _bigger._" She noticed for the first time.

But then they were interrupted by a knock at the door. Mrs. Uley glared at Sam, a look that said _we are not near finished_ and went to the door.

It was Old Quil and Billy Black on the other side, Old Quil was standing behind Billy, pushing his chair.

"Hello." Quil said, with his calm voice. "We came to see how you were doing and if…Sam well I guess you are back then."

Quil extended his hand to shake Sam's, Sam put out his own reluctantly, he was still hot he knew. But it would have been disrespectful to the highest degree to not shake an elders hand.

Quil's eyes bulged when his skin made contact with Sam. Sam saw that Quil had tapped Billy on the shoulder. And Billy took a closer look at Sam.

"Sir." Sam said, nodding at Billy. Then withdrew his hand from Quil, who was still looking at Sam.

"I think Sam, it would be best for you to come with us. Maybe we can shed some…light on where you have been."

"I have to see Leah first." Sam said, automatically. And once he said it he realized it was true, he knew she was probably a mess, and he had to fix that.

"I don't think…" Billy chimed in.

"No." Sam said, not meaning to growl.

"Samuel Uley!" His mother said, sounding shocked that he was talking back to an elder.

Then Sam started shaking. "I…I have to see Leah…" He got out through his clattering teeth.

"It's alright." Quil said, talking quietly, he put up a hand to keep Mrs. Uley from coming closer to Sam, and pulled Billy back a little. "That's alright, he can go see Leah. See how he feels…around her. Then come down to the center for a meeting. Does that sound reasonable to you Sam?"

Sam nodded. "Okay." He was confused, the elders were acting weird. His mother looked…_afraid_ of him. All he could think about was seeing Leah.

He ran past Quil and Billy before anyone changed their minds.

Sam was running the long way to Leah's even in this state he knew he needed to cool down before he saw her.


	8. Chapter Seven

**Sorry this took so long, it's been busy to say the least. SO, I published two chapters. I know...I know...calm down :) And, as always, reviewreviewreview, if you would be so kind**

**Chapter Seven**

Leah was going to put up more fliers. That's all she did now, she made copies, she hung them, then she waited by the phone, for someone, anyone, who had information. Each time it would ring she was terrified, sure it was someone calling to say he was dead.

But she couldn't really believe it, not if she was going to wake up each day.

She was a mess, her parents kept trying to get her to eat, to sleep, shower. But she couldn't, she wasn't sleeping anymore, and she wasn't hungry, her dirty clothes were fitting loose, and she could feel bags under her eyes when she blinked.

Leah carried the armful of fliers with Sam's smiling face on them.

"Please come home." She whispered to them. Leah made sure to pull the door shut behind her, she had already left it open twice, and both times a raccoon had gotten in the house.

"Leah?" She heard him say. She turned to the woods to the left of her house, and looked at them. She was too scared to even say his name, like it would make him disappear or something.

Sam took a couple steps out of the woods. Leah continued to stare at him, she couldn't feel her body anymore.

He had grown, he must have been over six feet now, and even through his shirt she could see his muscles.

"Leah, are you…okay? I can leave if you want…"

Leah walked down the steps until she was a couple of feet away from him. He looked at the posters in her hands, and a spasm of pain shot across his face.

She started to take deep breaths, and Sam saw tears starting to course down her face, and for the first time, ever, she didn't try to hide them. "Sam?" She finally whispered.

And then she dropped the posters and flung herself at him. She was taking deep ragged breaths, and he wrapped his arms around her, having to be only a little careful, with his newfound strength.

He did, however, tighten his grip. She had lost weight, he could tell, she felt even skinner in his arms then usual. He breathed in her scent, which he could now smell more acutely.

"Lee-lee, I'm so sorry. I am so, so sorry. I am sorry I left. And after we…"

Leah continued to cling to him for another minute before she got control of herself. She lowered herself from Sam, so she could look him in the eyes, but was still touching him.

"Where did you go?" She asked finally. She was also noticing how warm he was.

"I can't…I can't tell you Leah. I want to but I can't."

She stuck her chin out in that familiar way, and he could tell she was pissed. "Do you know…what I have _been _through. I thought you were…I thought you were _dead_." Her voice cracked on the last word.

"I'm sorry. But I didn't…I didn't want to leave, I didn't choose to."

Leah slapped him, square across the face. She was still breathing deep.

Sam took a step towards her and took her in his arms again.

She finally relaxed a little.

"Don't _do_ that again." She said at last.

"I won't." He promised, feeling his own eyes getting a little wet.

"I'm serious. I don't think…I don't know if I'd survive it again if you left me."

The thought rattled Sam. "Alright Lee-lee. Okay, I won't leave you again, I promise." Then he remembered something. "Well," He said, trying to smile. "Except for tonight, the elders want to meet with me about something."

"Something to do with why you left?"

He nodded into her hair.

"Then you'll come back?" She asked him.

He nodded again.

"Well, that's okay then."


	9. Chapter Eight

**Chapter Eight**

Sam walked back from the meeting, feeling better. A lot better, well, mostly a lot better.

He had found out he was a…_werewolf_. Of all stupid things. That he was a _protector_. That bottom line was the legends were true. And he was one of the lucky few.

All the elders were there, including Harry Clearwater, who he was a little shocked to see.

They explained it to him, that he was a wolf, that others would probably soon follow, that he would lead the pack. Billy's face turned a little stony at that part, and someone coughed. But Quil just kept going.

Everything was made clearer to him. Well, except one thing.

"Well Sam that's about it…" Quil said, glancing at Harry. "And you saw Leah, then?"

"Uh, yes. Yes, sir." Sam said, a little confused as why he really cared.

"And did you…" Quil coughed. "Feel…anything different for her?"

Sam thought he misheard him, was he not supposed to love Leah anymore since he was a werewolf? "No sir, I still felt the same way." He said it a little defiantly.

A concerned look crossed Harry's face.

"Well, good then, that's it for now Sam. And you know to ask us, about anything. It's hard for you, being the first one. But it will be easier, as you get a pack, as you get brothers."

"Right." Sam nodded, now he was supposed to lead a _pack_ in the way of the werewolf? What. The. Fuck.

Harry had looked like he wanted to say something to Sam, after the meeting, but Sam successfully dodged him, and left. He wanted to get home to Leah, and thought he would probably have to sneak in to do so.

Leah had her window open, and was leaning out it when Sam approached the house.

She waved to him and smiled then backed away from the window so he could get in. Sam found it much easier then ever to make the jump.

Leah was sitting on her bed when he entered.

"Hi." She said sounding shy.

"Hi." He said, taking his accustomed place across from her on the bed.

"How was the meeting?" She asked.

"Fine." He said, the elders had made it clear, he couldn't tell anyone, no matter how much he wanted to.

"You got taller, and bigger. A lot taller and bigger actually. And you're hot, really hot. And now your hair's gone." She motioned to his newly cropped hair, the elders said it would make his…coat…more manageable. The rest weren't questions, Sam nodded his head, and she nodded hers. Leah knew it was part of the things he couldn't tell her now, part of this new secret between them.

"And you got skinnier, why did you stop eating?" Sam sounded a little annoyed, that she would starve herself.

"I was too…worried to eat." She admitted, still looking a little pissed.

"I didn't want you to worry." Sam said quietly.

"What did you think I would do?" She sounded annoyed.

Sam looked up into her eyes, and he saw her worry, it was etched in there deep and he felt terrible all over again.

Leah sat forward to lean against him, they both ended up laying down on her bed, holding on to each other for dear life. Leah turned up to look at him, and brushed her lips against his, it was a light touch, but didn't stay that way for long.

Somehow he ended up on top of her, and they were moving together fiercely, quickly, like it was going to end soon. Leah's arms were wrapped around his head, pulling his as close to her as she could manage. Sam was putting his lips wherever he could reach, her eyes, lips, down her throat, over to her shoulder.

Nothing about it was gentle, and nothing about it was want. It was necessity, they were each others air, and it _felt _like life or death.

Sam slipped inside her the second time, and they rocked together forcefully, Leah pulling him in as close as she could, Sam holding on to her as tight as he could.

At that time they felt like they were going to loose each other, a feeling that would be brushed off in the morning as paranoia, or maybe overexcitement at seeing each other again. After all, what could keep them apart?


	10. Chapter Nine

**Chapter Nine**

"Emily?" Leah yelled into the phone. "Is that _really_ you?" Then she laughed.

Sam looked up from the makeshift folding table in their kitchen, and smiled, Leah had finally gone back to being…Leah. She stopped coming to work with him, and calling every two hours. But he still woke up at night and saw her staring at the ceiling.

He knew she was worried that he would leave. That he wouldn't be able to help it again. When she did that he just pulled her closer and tucked her head under his chin.

"Shhh, honey, go to bed. Sleep." And eventually she would.

Three weeks after he had come back and they found a little house to rent, it wasn't too far from the garage where he worked, and it would be easy to leave when Leah went to college in December, she had applied for a late admission, since Sam hadn't heard from his community college and she wanted to be sure she had gotten in.

"University of Washington, Seattle." She answered when people asked her where she was going. Then she would look at Sam and smile. "Most likely."

As it turned out he had gotten in, and was taking business classes at a community college not far from hers, they had their current place until November. It was all perfect.

"Yeah Em, I know it's been way too long. Right you still have to meet him. Oh really? No, she didn't tell me yet. So you and your mom are coming for _your_ party? Well I guess you'll meet him them. Okay, yeah talk to you later. You too."

Leah hung up the phone and sat on Sam's lap. "You get to meet Emily." She announced happily. "Her and my aunt are coming, and Harry and Sue are having a welcoming party."

"Good, I've heard enough about her."

Leah rolled her eyes. "She's like my sister. We practically grew up together. Actually she's much more like my mother, even though she's not much older then me."

"A second Sue, sounds a little scary Lee-lee." Sam teased. Leah only kissed him.

"Well I'm off, I have to go help my mom clean my room out, she already has plans for it. Think she misses me much?" Leah shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Be back in a few hours!" She called as she went out the door.

Sam turned back to his cereal. It was his third bowl that morning, ever since becoming a wolf, he was hungry, all the time. He was the only one yet, but had a pretty good handle on his phasing, as the elders called it.

Sam finished his food and dumped the bowl in the sink. A little too hard apparently, since it broke.

"Aw, fuck." He swore, then looked under the sink for some paper towels. His hand reached into the very back corner, no paper towels only a plastic bag.

_Plastic bag? _he wondered, what the hell. He pulled it out. It was from the 7-11 down the street, and inside it was a…oh fuck.

Sam turned the box over, like it would tell him what it was doing there if he did it enough times.

But really, it didn't need to tell him anything, what _else _would Leah be doing with a pregnancy test.

Sam put the box in the bag, wrapping it up, and the bag back under the sink, well, at least Sam knew they would have something really…_interesting _to talk about that night.

He went to work, that day, and went through all the motions of his car fixing, without really thinking about it.

What if Leah_ was_ pregnant? They had been careful, every time, but that didn't mean it was impossible. But what if she was? _Would it be so bad? _He thought. He could see himself and Leah with a baby, but she was going to college, and he didn't want anything to get in her way of that.

But _he _didn't have to go to college, or he could arrange his schedule to be home when she wasn't. Sam had always wanted a family with Leah, it was just happening a lot sooner then he thought.

At the same time, Leah was at her parent's house trying to clean out her very full closet. When you lived in a small space, you made every part of it functional.

Sue was happily humming and dusting. Trying to chat with Leah, who was answering yes. No. Maybe. She couldn't concentrate, and her hand kept flying down by her stomach.

But she couldn't think about it too much, or else it would show all over her face and her mother would ask questions. Her mom wasn't too thrilled about Leah moving in with Sam, a little over one month after graduation, Leah didn't think she would jump for joy at a grandbaby quite yet.

And she didn't want one either. Really. Not now. But she kept seeing her holding a little Sam looking thing in her arms…

All in all it took about three hours to get the room "prepped." whatever the hell _that_ meant for Sue. Leah was a little nervous. They had lunch, and Seth stayed at the television, watching like a loser.

"Hey Leah!" He called as she was leaving. "Absence really has made the heart grow fonder!" Then he grinned.

"Haha." Leah said, and flipped him off. _Rise above_. She told herself, she was going to rise above. But then she saw the old corduroy pillow from her room on the counter, picked it up and flung the heavy thing at his head. It hit in square in the face. Leah couldn't help but cackle a little, and left, leaving that one on a pretty high note.

When she got home that night Sam was sitting at the table in the kitchen.

"Hey." He said when she walked in the door. He stood up and went over to greet her.

"How was your day?" She asked. "Mine was good, I got to nail Seth in the head, and you know how that just warms my little heart." She said smiling.

"Good, it was good, but Leah…"

"And my mother has lost her mind, even more. Now the room is 'prepped' whatever that means, I think she is doing something really dangerous in there. Perhaps a poison lab, for the people she doesn't like…" She kept babbling.

"Leah." Sam said a little louder, clearing his throat. "I think we…need to talk."

"Yeah?" She finally said, looking concerned, he had gotten her attention. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's _wrong_, but I found…I found your, uh, pregnancy test. Under the sink." He finished quickly.

"Oh." Was all Leah said, no longer meeting Sam's eyes.

"Leah." He asked. "Talk to me, why haven't you told me yet?"

"I just…didn't want you to be upset, or worried…I don't know, I thought you might be mad…and I wasn't sure, I've only missed one month… "

"Mad? That we might be having a baby?" Leah looked up to see if he was just trying to make her feel better, but he didn't _look _upset, actually he looked kind of happy.

"Well, it's just not a convenient time, with us going to college."

"Leah, we would make it work. I want to have a family with you, okay? So why don't you just take the test, and then we can find out."

"Yeah, I guess."

It took fifteen minutes in all to take the damn thing. Leah opened the door.

"We have to wait for two minutes." She announced, setting the stick carefully down on the table by the sink.

She was pacing around the room, as Sam set the egg timer, and she didn't stop pacing until it _dinged!_ Sam watched her walk back and forth, then back and forth again.

After the little _ding _Leah looked at him, she went over to the stick, looked at the stick, then consulted the box, looked at the stick again, then the box as if to make sure.

She then deposited the stick in the trash can, along with the box, and came to sit next to Sam on the bed.

"So…?" He asked her, after she didn't say anything for a couple of minutes.

"Nope." She said quietly shaking her head. "No, I'm not…pregnant."

She looked away from Sam, and quickly wiped something out from under her eyes.

Sam put his arm around her, forcing her to face him. "Shhh, it's alright Lee-lee, it's going to be okay."

"I know." She said, her voice sounding a little thicker than normal. "I just…I guess I just wanted this more then I thought I did." She cleared her throat.

"But we'll have it one day. It's going to be alright Leah, I promise, we will have our little family one day. In a nicer house." He thought out loud.

"And who is going to pick this house out?" She asks.

"Well, I have to know it won't fall down, so unless you go to school for architectural work…"

"Well fine." She said, smiling. "But then I get to pick the color, and I want a green house. Like dark green, like the forest."

"Okay." Sam happily agreed. "And four kids. So I have to have plenty of rooms…"

"Four? Uh, try two, if you give birth then we can have ten, but since I'm all over _that _one we are having two. Maybe three."

Sam smiled, seeing his house with their kids running around outside.

It seemed too go to be true.


	11. Chapter Ten

**Oh, you gotta love Paul. More updates sooner if I get some reviews!**

**Chapter Ten**

As the summer turned into fall, and the days started getting cooler, Sam didn't notice, he also noticed he didn't need to have clothes on to go outside anymore.

The elders didn't give him anything he had to do, much to his annoyance.

"You are the leader Sam, figure it out."

That was helpful.

So he ran patrols, got more used to the land, and with his enhanced senses he realized how much he had missed out on before.

He wanted to know La Push, though, every part of it, every rock, all the woods, and the distances between all of them. If he was going to have to lead a pack through it all, then he has to know everything about it.

It was the beginning of November when the next wolf joined the pack.

Sam was running down the east side, chasing a deer to pass the time, when another voice entered his head.

_What the fuck? _They sounded scared.

The elders had told Sam that, when pack members were phased they could hear each other, but it threw him off none the less.

_It's going to be okay. _Sam said, trying to sound confident yet calming.

_Sam, what the fuck is going on? Why am I a…fucking wolf? _Paul. Sam recognized the voice. Did Paul really need to be the next person to phase, Sam thought.

_I heard that._ Paul said, managing to sound annoyed through all the pain.

_Right. _Sam would have to keep that in mind. He saw where Paul was through his thoughts. _Stay there, I will come meet you._

Sam was making plans, Paul wouldn't be able to be with people for two weeks…and Sam would have to be in wolf form the whole time.

But he couldn't just disappear again, he wouldn't do that to Leah. And there was his job…okay he thought, he had a plan.

_Paul? Paul I am coming alright, but I need to stop somewhere first. Stay where you are. Everything will be alright, I can explain when I get there._

_ Right, okay. _Paul said, Sam could hear the shaking through his voice.

He ran home in his wolf form, and got some of the clothes that he left in an old dead tree near the back. Then he ran into the house, human form, to call his boss and tell him he wouldn't be at work for two weeks, because he was sick.

"Cough, cough." Sam tried, and hung up before anything else could be said.

Then he dialed Leah's cell number. _Ring, ring, ring…_

"Please answer your phone Leah…"

"Hello?"

"HI!" He said, realizing how loud it was with her answer.

"Sam? Do you think I've become deaf since I've seen you this morning, what's going on?"

"No, sorry…it's just that I have to leave again."

There was silence. "Where are you going?"

"I can't tell you." He said, hating at how he really _couldn't _tell her.

"Then I guess _why _would be a pointless question." This time silence from Sam's end. "Well, for how long, when are you…leaving?"

"Now, and probably," Hopefully, he thought to himself. "At least two weeks."

"Two weeks." She said, it wasn't a question. "And you won't be able to call me I'm guessing…so right. Well be careful then, I hope you don't die." Again her voice cracked on the last word. Yeah, Sam knew she was pissed, but he also heard her worry come through. Leah had always put up walls, she was trying to protect herself.

"Lee-lee, please don't be mad, if I had any choice…"

"Yeah," Sam could practically hear her rolling her eyes. "I can't imagine how that would feel.

The line went dead.

_Well, fuck. _He was going to have to deal with _that_ when he got back.

Sam ran outside and phased right when he hit the woods.

_Paul?_ He asked, feeling a little stupid.

_Oh you remembered me. How thoughtful. _Paul snarled.

Sam remembered one of the things the elders told him was that phasing was

directly connected with you emotions, the better you controlled your emotions, then the better you could control your phasing. He had a feeling that Paul was going to have a bit of trouble with that one.

_Phasing? Dude, what the fuck are you talking about?_

_I am almost there Paul, I'll explain. What are you doing. No stay there. PAUL. Stop it! STOP!_

And then Paul did stop.

_I can't move my legs. _Paul thought, panicking. He was on the edge of a cliff, and was about to throw himself off. _I would rather be dead then crazy. _

_You're not either. _Sam came out of the woods just then, and he saw Paul's eyes bulge.

_Sam? Is that…you? _

Sam nodded his head.

_Like I said you're not crazy. Now are you going to jump or can I let you go?_

_ Right, I won't jump, Jesus Christ dude chill out…what do you mean by let me? Did _you _do this to my legs?_

_ Okay, so you're not crazy, you're just a wolf…the legends are true…_

It took Sam about three hours to get it through Paul's skull what was happening.

When he had finally told him everything Paul had taken it fairly well.

_Will there be more of us then? _Sam was surprised by how quickly Paul had slipped into the plural.

But the it hit him, this was his _brother_ his _pack member. _They were responsible for each other's lives now, for the tribe's lives.

_You're making me tear up. _Paul interrupted.

_Yeah, there will be more of us, as more guys age. The elders don't know how many…_

And then Sam was interrupted by Paul's howling. He was phasing back into a man. It was earsplitting. But sort of fascinating to watch, Sam had only _done it _he had never seen it.

It looked just like it felt, it was as if Paul's fur was turning inside of him, like it was rolling over on his body to expose the layer of skin.

Sam phased back as well, doing it a little faster and a little smoother then Paul.

"Paul. Paul, listen to me, everything's going to be alright. You're just phasing back to a person, stay with me Paul…"

And that was how it went on for two weeks. Sam staying with Paul, trying to help him get through the phasing and adjust it.

But it was as he suspected, Paul had a harder time controlling his emotions. Even in his wolf form as exhibited one night.

Sam was thinking about Leah, it had been two weeks already, and Sam thought they would need to be there for a couple more days before Paul could stop with the spontaneous phasing.

_Dude, niiice. _

_Don't even go there Paul. _

But of course, Paul went there.

Sam jumped up and started growling and snapping his jaw. Paul immediately did the same, and it wasn't long before they were fighting. Paul got his paw across Sam's shoulder and Sam had bitten into Paul's neck.

The two wolves backed away from each other, still growling, but trying to lick their wounds, which were, by now healed.

_That's sick, super healing?_ _Why didn't you mention that?_

_ I didn't know about it. _Sam suddenly felt exhausted. He would need to control himself, he couldn't go attacking every pack member every time he was upset.

_Almost as fine as your hottie Leah._

Sam decided to stay silent.

_You don't have to get mad, I would totally tap that._

_ Paul, do me a favor and try to control yourself, if you can keep one form for a day then we can get out of here, alright?_

_ Sorry man, I guess you want to get back to…_ And then Paul flashed a naked picture of Leah through his mind.

Sam again didn't say anything, only glared at him, and decided that for the next however many months, Paul was going to get the worst patrol shift.


	12. Chapter Eleven

**It's kind of like when a car is speeding at a brick wall, and you know it's going to hit it, without a doubt. And then it does.**

**Chapter Eleven**

Leah decided she needed to stay busy the two weeks that Sam wasn't there.

Of course, eating and sleeping were the two things she didn't get done, but other than that, overall she thought she coped with it a lot better then last time.

Sort of.

She was still trying to find a job, and threw all of her energy into that.

But after the two weeks had come and gone she started to get that knot in her stomach. With that she stopped bothering to prepare the meals she had only thrown out anyway, and the familiar bags were appearing under her eyes.

At night she mostly lay awake, unable to sleep, sure that the next sound she heard would be Sam opening the door, calling her name out, and coming to apologize at how he had had to leave.

But this time, she was also pissed at him. She believed him that he had to go, and that he didn't want to, but couldn't he at least tell her something, didn't he trust her at least _that _much?

It was seventeen days until he finally showed up, and when he did he wasn't alone. Sam was in the front yard wearing his cutoff shorts and a tee-shirt, and he was standing next to a guy wearing only shorts, and looked about as ripped as Sam did.

"Hell-o?" Leah called from her car. She was glad that she had showered yesterday, for the first time since he left, and her hair was now up in a clean ponytail. She had also put on clean clothes, and the bags under her eyes, because of the other improvements, were hardly noticeable. Mostly.

Sam and the other guy looked like they were deep in conversation. Both of their heads, the other guy's looked cleanly shaven, she noticed, swiveled to look at her.

"Hi." She said again lamely. Sam smiled at her, and she couldn't quite smile back.

"Leah this is Paul…I think you two have met before…"

"Hey." Paul said, with a sort of sleezy grin.

_Paul? _As in Paul-who-wants-to-have-sex-with-every-girl-that-moves Paul? She had seen him not too long ago and he did not look like…well this good. It would probably help him on his mission in life.

"Yeah." Leah said, she was pissed, and not in the mood to make nice with Sam's new buddies, or whatever.

She walked right past them and into the house.

She heard Paul laugh and he made some obscene hand gestures, that she thought pertained to her and Sam. Yeah, it was _definitely _the same Paul. She went into the bedroom and eyed it like it had offended her.

She could feel her anger building up, starting in her stomach then moving until it was in her chest, up to her throat. _How dare he_? She thought.

How dare Sam prance around with his little friends whenever he felt like it, like she was some housewife, content to sit at home and wait for him. Like she _en-fucking-joyed _worrying about him for weeks, not knowing when he would be back. Did he think it was fun for her?

"That what was fun for you?" Sam asked, leaning in the doorway, with his arms crossed, looking at her.

"Oh. I didn't think I said that out loud." She continued her pacing around the room, and Sam stood, waiting.

"Well I'm glad you're back, and making new friends." She said at last, stopping a few feet in front of him.

"I don't like to leave you Leah. It's not fun for me either." He obviously figured out what she was talking about then.

"It must be really tough on you." She rubbed at her eyes, Sam noticed that the bags were back under them, which meant she hadn't slept. Which was his fault.

"If I could tell you then I would. If I was allowed…"

"Allowed? Who won't _allow _you?"

"The elders." There, he would give her that much.

"Oh." She looked surprised, and he saw she looked marginally less angry. "So it's really not…you're not just not telling me because you don't think you can trust me?"

"Of course not. Leah I know I can trust you and I do, but it's more then that, there's also your safety. If I was allowed, and I thought it was safe for you, then I would."

Leah sighed and came to put her arms around him and buried her head in his chest.

"And it's not illegal? I'm not going to have to be your fake alibi or anything?"

"No." He said, smiling.

"I'm sorry." She said in a small voice, still talking into his chest. "I didn't mean to flip out…I just, well I get worried that you're not going to come back and…"

"I will always come back to you Leah, I promise. And…what were you going to say?"

"And…" Then she attacked him, or well it was such a surprise it felt like an attack.

Before either of them knew it Sam had her pushed up against the wall. Leah wrapped on leg around him as he slipped her pants off then the other, she nipped his bottom lip causing him to shudder.

He smiled at her wickedly, before setting her on the ground, then throwing one of her legs over his shoulder.

Sam circled her with his tongue, before plunging in, soon joined by his rolling fingers.

"Christ." Leah said, having to put her hands on his shoulders to hold herself up. Her hands found their way to his hair, which she was holding on to for dear life. "Oh…god…" She was barely standing by that point, and would have fallen if Sam didn't keep a hand around her when he stood up.

"I need you…now." She panted.

The frame above her head banged into the wall as he thrust in her, one time, twice, three times, until she was saying his name. Suh-am. Her nails dug into his back, and he buried his head into her neck.

He held her head sweetly, kissing her on the nose when they were both finished. She smiled at him, as he slid first her panties on, and then jeans.

"You had better get dressed." She told him, still holding on with one arm, because although she would never admit it, her legs were still a little wobbly.

"That seems counterproductive." He said.

She shook her head and flashed a grin. "It's Emily's homecoming party, dummy. We have to go to my parents."

Within the next hour, they were both showered, dressed, and in Sam's truck on their way to the Clearwater's house. Sam's mom was going to meet them there, and it sounded like the Blacks were also going to join them.

"Full house then, huh?" Sam said as Leah went over the guest list.

"Yeah, especially since Em and my aunt are coming. If they don't show up I just might kill her…" Leah said shaking her head.

The only thing they had to bring into the house was a can of cranberry sauce, Leah's cooking was notorious, and not in a good way, so it was all her mother wanted her to bring.

"And do you know what the sad part is?" Leah asked, referring to the sauce. "She actually _pretended_ like she had no idea what I was talking about, like she really thought enjoying a _can _of cranberry sauce, to _homemade _was plausible." She shook her head, and Sam smiled at her. He didn't say anything because, honestly, he was a little relieved that Sue didn't let Leah make it. Because when there were inevitably leftovers, and Sue "suggested" that he bring it home, it was his meal for the next week.

"Leah!" Harry yelled happily as she came in the kitchen. "And Sam." His smile faltered. Sam knew Harry didn't approve of him being with Leah any more, but he just wasn't sure why exactly that was. "Glad you guys made it. Everyone's in the living room, if you want to say hello."

Their small room was crowded, there was Sue, and Seth, Jacob Black and Billy, plus Sam's mother sitting off to the side, being as shy as she was. Leah gave Sam's hand a squeeze, and went over to sit by Mrs. Uley. Sam smiled at her gratefully, his mom had always loved Leah.

Leah and his mother ducked their heads together, Leah even got her to howl out a laugh. Leah covered his moms hand with her own and continued on talking.

Sam glanced over to Jacob. It was explained to him that Jacob would be the natural leader of the pack, because of bloodlines, which also explained Billy's face at the very first meeting.

He wondered when Jacob would phase, it had to been soon, within the next year he guessed. While Sam welcomed more company, mostly to dilute Paul's thoughts, he didn't want to have to bring any more guys into this mess, especially such young ones.

Jacob felt Sam looking at him, and looked up. Sam smiled, and Jacob's glare only deepened, the corners of his mouth turning down as he looked away.

"Emily!" Sam heard Leah yell, Leah excused herself from Mrs. Uley and went over to the kitchen.

Sam turned around, he finally got to meet this…

Emily.

It was like he had become undone. It was like he was cut from his old life, and all that mattered was this new one in front of him. Like everything had disconnected from him in that second, and had simply floated away.

There were these new strings tying him to _her_.

Not one string, but a million. Not strings, but steel cables. A million steel cables all tying him to one thing-to the very center of the universe.

Sam was aware then that _Emily _hadn't seen him yet, that she was busy talking to the girl standing next to her.

And now that girl was smiling at Sam, waving him over. But he couldn't take his eyes off of _her_.

Then his thoughts caught up to him a little more. That other girl was…it was Leah.

Oh. Oh no, this was not good.

Sam tried to get a grip on himself, but it wasn't fully working, somehow he had made he legs move so he was standing next to them.

"Em, this is Sam." Leah put grabbed his upper arm, twining it with hers like she had done so many times before. But he didn't _feel _it. He was barely even aware of her right now. "And Sam…_earth to Sam_, this is Emily…my cousin." Leah looked confused.

"Nice to meet you." Emily smiled awkwardly, looking back to Leah like, _what's with him_?

Sam just stuck out his hand, finding that he couldn't make any words.

"Sam? Hello, Sam?" Leah said trying to get his attention, since he was still staring at Emily. She just made a confused face and turned away from him. "Well, then just see how _that _goes…Emily come on, I'll introduce you to everyone." And she pulled Emily into the kitchen.

Somewhere, deep inside, Sam knew he had more or less ruined everyone's night. He couldn't stop staring at Emily the whole night, and everyone was pretending not to notice.

Everyone except Harry and Leah.

Leah looked confused and worried, she kept looking from Sam back to Emily.

And Harry, well, he just looked worried. But there was nothing on his face that showed he had any confusion about what was going on here.

Emily just kept looking at Leah, shrugging and shaking her head like she had no idea what was going on.

After everyone had left, except Emily who was staying with them, Leah started on the dishes.

"Mind helping me with the trash Sam?" Harry asked, indicating to the three black bags. Leah didn't even glance up.

"Huh?" Sam said, being pulled from his entrancement with Emily.

"The trash?" Harry said again.

While they took the bags outside, Emily and Leah continued washing dishes.

"I…I don't know what's wrong with him." Leah admitted, handing a plate for Emily to dry.

"Well…maybe he's just…sick?" Emily suggested.

"It's like…well he can't take his eyes of you." Leah said, sounding hurt and confused.

"I don't know Leah. But you know you don't have to worry about me doing anything. I wouldn't want to hurt you…in that way ever."

Leah managed a small smile. "Yeah Em, I know."

Outside Harry and Sam were having another conversation.

Harry demanded to know what Sam felt, when he saw Emily. Although Sam was a little shocked by the question, he tried to answer it, with the strings…and everything.

Harry muttered a few words Sam had never heard him say before, and usually didn't show up in most conversations.

"You imprinted." Harry's voice was flat.

"I…what? I thought that happened with _ducks_…"

"No, it can happen with wolves too. Damn it. I was worried this would happen…at the first meeting do you remember Quil's question? If you felt the same way for Leah?"

Sam nodded, he remembered, thinking it was a little bizarre, even in light of everything else that had happened.

"We knew you didn't imprint on her. And now you've imprinted on her cousin."

"Wait, what exactly is imprinting?" The word sounded funny coming off his tongue.

Harry explained that it was more or less like love at first sight. Only a lot more. It was finding your soul mate, your other half or however you preferred it. That it couldn't be changed and the imprintee, never turned away from the imprinter.

"So," Sam finally came to this thought. "What does that mean for Leah."

Harry's mouth made a hard line.

"Oh." Sam said.

At that point Leah came outside.

"Are you ready to go?" She asked Sam, looking at something above his head instead of him.

"Uh, I think I'll walk home." He said. She didn't say anything, only gave her father a kiss on the cheek and went to the truck. But before she got in Sam saw her face, it was a mixture of pain, and worry. Her walls were up now, and he really couldn't blame her.

Sam stayed outside, even after Harry went in.

He heard, a couple of minutes later, the back door open and close, and he _smelled_ Emily, all the way from where he was.

She came walking towards him, and took a deep breath.

"Look," She started. "I don't know what's happening here, but you're with Leah, and even if you weren't she's my cousin and I wouldn't do anything to hurt her so, maybe you could just stop staring at me…like you're doing right now."

"I'm sorry." Sam said and he meant it. "It's just…I feel this connection between us, and I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me sometime." He didn't know what possessed him to say that, only he was making a real jackass out of himself.

"No." Emily said. "Thank you." She turned and left.

Sam took that as his cue and make his way home.

Leah was sitting in the living room when he got back, her head was in her hands.

She must have heard the door shut, but she didn't look up.

"Leah, I…"

"Not tonight." She said, without looking up.

"What?" Sam thought he must have misheard her. He thought she must have muttered some profanity at him and was getting ready for the explosion. For Leah to be yelling, and screaming at him. For her to throw things, and damn him to hell.

It wasn't as if he didn't deserve it.

"Not tonight." She repeated. He had never seen Leah like this before, never heard her sound so…defeated. "Whatever it is that's going on with you…just not tonight."

She walked into her room and shut the door. _Her_ room he had thought, though it was only hours ago he had thought of it as _their_ room.


	13. Chapter Twelve

**I've thought a lot about how I wanted this scene to go, and I've thought about it, an re-thought it, then wrote it, and re-wrote it, and this might not the best way to do it, but it's where I settled. Leah just seems too strong to breakdown in front of Sam, in my opinion...**

**Chapter Twelve**

Needless to say she did not sleep much that night, actually she didn't sleep at all. Leah did not even have the heart to change her clothes. She just laid on her bed, staring at the ceiling.

Wondering when she was going to wake up.

Leah had always been particularly gifted at self deception. And by the morning, she has almost convinced herself, _almost_, that she had imagined it. That Sam has a good reason for looking at Emily, for acting the way he did, that it was not what she thought it was. Hell, that is was just about anything but what she thought it was.

She heard the knock at the door just a little after the sun came up.

Leah sighed, knowing full well who it would be.

Sam stepped into the room without saying anything, he only looked at Leah, lying dejectedly on the bed, and he noticed she was wearing the same clothes as last night.

He didn't know how to begin, and she didn't know if she wanted him to.

"So." She said finally.

"I'm sorry about last night." He finally said, blurting it out.

"It's okay." She said, then gathered some steam to continue. "It's alright I…I'm not mad at you Sam, well I was, but I'm not anymore . We'll just have to figure it out. But…together okay. Because I don't want to end this…I don't want to end us."

And she gave him that look, her look. The one where he felt like he was being melted, the one where Leah was just herself, without walls, the one where she was trusting him to _not_ break her heart. And it killed him that he didn't feel anything.

He didn't know how he was going to say it, only that he had to. "I think that…the thing is we need…" He stopped, trying to gather his breath, to say the thing to Leah he honestly never thought he would, to do everything to her he promised he never would. "I think we need to break up."

And in that second everything in Leah's face just…died.

She didn't say anything. Only looked at Sam, waiting for him to explain. For him to say, never mind, I take it back, I was only joking.

Sam tried to continue, to explain something to her that he couldn't. "It's nothing that you did, it's just that I…it wouldn't be fair to you. Since I saw her…and feel…well, that I feel the way I do."

No emotion passed through Leah's face. But he could hear her teeth snap, could see that she was breathing heavily.

"That's all I get? After everything…'it's not you it's me and I belong with someone I just met?' That's it?"

But what could he really say? She was right, that was all she got, he was ending their relationship with no warning, he was breaking up with the person he had promised himself too, he was…destroying his best friend. And he had no reason, not one he could give her.

"Leah, I'm sorry. I'm so…sorry." He was sorry, he was sorry that he was hurting her like this. But he couldn't be sorry that he had seen Emily, not when he was so sure they belonged together, not when he felt so strongly for her. Feelings that had eclipsed his love for Leah.

She nodded and stood up.

"I didn't want it to end like this." He said quietly.

Leah didn't say anything else, and it was the worst response that Sam could have imagined. It wasn't Leah. The person who walked out of the room resembled nothing of the Leah he knew, nothing of the strong girl he used to…love.

She was crushed, and he crushed her. There was nothing he could do to undo it, nothing he could say to fix it.

He saw Leah through the window, she was shaking. Not like she was sobbing, or like she was trying not to cry. Like her world had ended, like she was in the place where nothing you could do would help you get out.

Sam went around to the back and phased.

It took all about three seconds before Paul popped in.

_Oh shit._

_Thank-you Paul. _Sam's voice had an end-of-discussion tone.

_Imprinted? What? That sounds like it sucks shit dude! And she turned you down, cold. But does this mean…_

_ What? _

_ Well, Leah's like, up for grabs._

_ Paul, new rule, never speak to me again, alright?_

Then a new voice popped into their heads.

_What's happening? What's going on?_

Sam thought he recognized the voice but couldn't quite place it…

_Jared? _Paul thought, both of the wolves were running towards where this new voice…this new brother was.

_What's happening? _They both took that as a yes.

_ Jared, I need you to stay calm, alright? I'm Sam, and we are on our way to explain everything, just know everything's going to be alright…_

_What's happening to me? _Jared whimpered.

_You, have joined the sacred brotherhood where…_ Paul began to intone, before Sam gave him an alpha order to shut-the-hell-up.

Paul winced at it's magnification.

As Sam ran towards Jared, calculating another two weeks he would spend off the radar, he realized this was the second life he would be changing today, and at least this time he had practice, and at least this time, it wasn't completely his fault.


	14. Chapter Thirteen

**Jeez Louise, I do love me some Seth.**

**Chapter Thirteen**

It took Leah three weeks before she got up the courage to go get some of her stuff from _his _house. She still couldn't think his name without flinching.

Not that she let anyone else see.

On the first day, she walked into her kitchen, with four pairs of eyes on her, everyone's face showing a different emotion. Harry's, confirmation, Emily looked sad yet supportive, her mother looked speculative, and Seth looked like he had just woken up, which was probably the case.

"I hope you didn't paint my room." Was all that she said to her mom. "Because your favorite color is orange, which I hate, almost as much as I hate painting."

And they set up all of her stuff that she still had at home, which consisted of a dresser, and her bed with it's old sheets.

The couple of posters she had pinned up had been thrown away, and the rest of her stuff was…elsewhere.

Sue had known better then to try and get Leah to open up while they moved her things in from the garage.

Harry only pat her on the back.

Emily however, had given her a hug. "I'm so sorry Lee-lee." She whispered. Not noticing how Leah had frozen at the use of her old nickname.

That night she sat on her bed, once again not crying, but shaking. So hard her whole frame was clattering, that her teeth were chinking against one another. She felt like she was literally falling apart. Like her bone was disconnecting from muscle, piercing out from her skin. She felt like she just might be dying.

But she would not cry, she was not going to talk about it to anyone, because she was fine. Or she would be. Or she would _pretend _to be.

Even if her pretending came off to be sort of angry, that was much better then crushed any day.

But, eventually, she admitted, she would have to go over to _his_ house. To get her clothes.

She didn't want anything else, she didn't want any of their temporary crappy furniture they had shopped for, none of the plates, none of the pictures, especially not the ones of him and her.

She only had one thing that connected her thoughts directly to him, and that was in a small box between her bed frame and mattress.

She and Seth, who actually offered to help, drove he dad's truck over to the house. They already had a couple of boxes, and she knew, down to the sock, everything she wanted to get, it was going to be an easy in easy out trip.

_He_ was going to be at work anyway, they wouldn't even see him.

They went straight to her old room, she held her breath, trying to keep any memories at bay. They just hurt too much to completely cover up.

Leah ripped down the three articles of clothing that she was _not_ planning on bringing home with her, all were things that he had given her, and she didn't want them anymore.

Seth started by emptying her clothes from the dresser, and Leah from the closest.

The whole time Leah held her breath, waiting, expecting to hear his footsteps, the front door open, that for some reason, some out-of-the-blue one-in-a-million chance _reason_ he had come home from work early.

But they didn't hear him in the room, they made it through packing and bringing the first load of boxes out to the car. They made it back into the house, picked up the second load and almost made it to the step outside the house before they saw him.

"Oh." Was all Sam said, looking surprised to see them.

Both Seth and Leah's heads snapped up, like they had been yanked by a string. Each of them had shocked expressions, but only Leah's had that extra…_look_ behind her eyes. The one that only people who knew her well, knew spelled out sadness.

One that Sam himself could decipher

"Hello." Sam said, finally breaking the silence.

Leah felt like someone had literally hit her in the chest. Like she couldn't breathe. All she wanted to do was put her arms around Sam, and make things better…but she only bit down on the inside of her cheek. Thoughts like that would get her in trouble. Nothing was going to change back, she may as well get used to it.

"Hi." She said shortly, feeling like just saying that simple little word was going to kill her.

They all stood there a couple of seconds not saying anything.

"So…how have you been." It sounded lame, even to him.

"Fine." She wasn't looking at him, only at the box in front of her.

She shifted her weight, the box seemed to be getting heavier the longer she stood there.

"Can I help you or something?" Sam said, finally realizing what they were doing.

Leah and Sam had talked about moving out, but they had always thought they would be doing it together, and in one week. Off to college.

"No. It's fine, I've got it." Her voice was flat and her face pretty much the same.

Sam finally looked at her, and barely recognized her at all. Leah had always kept a close guard on her emotions, but there was no doubt she _had _them. To someone who didn't know Leah before, if they saw her now she looked heartless, she looked…dead.

More silence.

Seth lamely muttered something about one more box, and went in the house.

Leah walked down the stairs, the whole time avoiding Sam's face. She threw her box in the trunk and made to go over to the driver seat when Sam stepped into her path.

"Please Leah, will you at least talk to me. I feel…so terrible for what happened. For what I did. But can't we at least…_talk_?" He knew he should leave her alone, that he owed her that, but he had to try and fix it, to somehow make it better.

"I…no. We can't. I don't know what more you want me to say Sam." She forced his name out to show him how nonchalant she could be, how she was unaffected by him.

"I think you made your feelings pretty clear, and the only one I have is that I don't want to talk to you."

"But…"

"Get _out_ of my way." She said, her face looking desperate. It was as if something was about to spill out, like everything she was trying to control was about to break.

"Hey," Seth said stepping between Sam and Leah. "Sam can I talk to you?"

And Sam had to hand it to the kid that barely made it to his chin, for looking so pissed off at him, and not at all worried at the consequences.

Leah looked back at the ground and stepped in the truck. Her eyes focused on the steering wheel in front of her, she held on to it like it was a lifeline, but other then that nothing could actually be discerned from her face.

"Listen dude," Seth said, literally getting up in Sam's face. "I know you're '_bigger' _then me or whatever. But I am not afraid of trying to kick you ass if you don't back off."

"I was only trying to help…" Sam said, realizing that everything that had come out of his mouth since the party made him sound like a total asshole.

"Well you can stop, anytime, seriously." Seth said, flatly. "Because I think it's like, literally killing her to be here right now. Not that she's actually _show_ that, but well, that's really all _your_ fault, so you can't help. You can only spit in the friggin' hole you already dug." He finished with crossing his arms.

"Right." Sam said weakly, because everything Seth said was right.

"And don't come around the house."

"Seriously, Seth, you don't need to threaten me, I get it…"

"No." Seth said, as he walked back to the truck's passenger side. "That was me _helping_ you, because I think my mother might literally shoot you."

And Sam had no doubt that she would.

It wasn't very surprising to Seth that Leah didn't say anything on the drive home, or the rest of the day for that matter.

It wasn't until that night, when she was alone, that she let some of it wash over.

She would have to work on it harder, she thought, controlling herself. Because she had almost broke down, standing there with him.

She had almost let him see, to the full extent, what he had done to her. Which was the one thing she had promised herself wouldn't happen.

But now, she could allow herself a little of it, not crying of course, but something. She thought of him, how he looked, and how some of it was strange. Like the way he acted before, when they were…well the way he acted before.

He didn't have his shirt on, and he was coming out of the woods. Even though Leah's foggy eyes she could see he was tired. Like he had been up for weeks straight.

And if he was coming out of the woods, it meant he was not at work, which would mean he was where…?

But Leah pulled her thoughts in, and tucked them under that new black stone in her heart, the place that nobody, ever again, would reach.


	15. Chapter Fourteen

**Sorry! I know it's been a while, but I don' have any reasonable excuses...so I'm publishing TWO chapters. **

**Chapter Fourteen**

Now there were four members of the pack. It was the end of January, and Embry had joined. The newest pack members were getting younger and younger it seemed to Sam, and he thought, and everyone else agreed, Jacob would most reasonably be next.

Embry always got quiet when this came up. And, Sam knew, it was both in fear for his friend, and relief that Jacob wouldn't keep thinking Embry had abandoned him.

They couldn't tell anyone who absolutely didn't need to know, and it caused an inconvenience in all of their lives.

Well, except for Sam, who had basically turned into a hermit, save for the pack.

The pack, which at first he had hated the thought of, was now the only thing that he had done right, it was the only area of his life that he felt like he wasn't screwing up on.

There was his work, which he was having to skive off more and more now.

There was his _personal _life, which was in to big of a wreck to comprehend. Emily still wouldn't speak to him, and he had a rough time even trying to find the place to convince her to, since the Clearwater house where she was staying was obviously not an option.

So he would "bump into" her at the store, at a couple of the bars, on the beach. Anywhere he could, even though she had told him more than once there was no chance it would happen.

And Leah played into that too, because he couldn't, no matter how much he loved Emily, shake his guilt for what he had done to her. He had heard, from one person or another, that she had indefinitely postponed college for now. Which was again, something that was his fault.

So now the pack had become his saving grace. They felt like a family, because they were the only ones who really knew the truth. And Sam almost began to embrace being the leader, that they all looked to him.

But there was still Jacob. Sam knew he had to position if he wanted it, he was rightful alpha. So he was also watching Jacob too, which Jacob didn't seem too thrilled about. Jacob, Sam was told, had gone to Billy about how much he was _not _thrilled by it.

But Jacob didn't _seem_to be changing anytime soon. He was handing out with Chief Swan's girl now, the one Sam had pulled out of the woods last fall.

She had a look that was similar to Leah's, but now, Sam had to admit, was looking a little better, something Sam couldn't confirm about Leah anymore, since he never actually saw her in public.

So, in general it seemed, Sam thought that things couldn't get any worse.


	16. Chapter Fifteen

**Chapter Fifteen**

It was the coldest day of the year so far, which was why it was funny that Emily wasn't back yet, she had told Leah she was going for a walk on the beach and would be back soon.

Well, it was way past soon and she was yet to be seen.

Emily's absence was one of the few things Leah actually cared about these days. And she didn't think she would make it through any of it without her cousin.

Emily had decided to stay indefinitely, to try and support Leah, and she did, as best as anyone could. Due to the fact that Leah refused to discuss any of it.

Although, technically, she didn't refuse she just left the room whenever anything that could remotely lead to talking about _him _would come up.

The only time she would talk about him was when she and Emily would marvel over what an incredible jackass he was being. How he kept throwing himself at Emily, and, as Emily assured Leah, it would be to no avail.

The phone started to ring, and Leah thought that is was probably Emily, calling to check in, or see if Leah needed anything at the store, or whatever.

Leah waited a couple of more times, to see if anyone else was going to answer it, she didn't like to answer the phone anymore, on account of who it could be, calling for someone else in the house.

But after it kept ringing, nobody answered, and Leah sighed and decided to risk it, since it was, most likely Emily after all.

"Hello?" She said, sounding cautious.

"Is this the…Clearwater residence?" The person on the other line said, as if he was reading their name off of something.

"Yeah." Leah's eyebrows pushed together, they never got telemarketing calls in the middle of the afternoon.

"I'm so sorry, but Emily Young has been in an accident, he gave us your number, said you were family. She's at the hospital now…"

"What happened?" Leah felt the blood draining from her face.

"She was attacked, by a bear, we were told. You should probably come down here. She's in the ICU, stable for now…"

Leah didn't listen to the rest of it, she just hung up the phone, and ran out to the truck, yelling to her parents what had happened. They jumped in Sue's car, and almost managed to keep up with Leah.

It was only a matter of minutes before Leah had found Emily's room.

She had an oxygen tube coming out of the good side of her face, and the rest looked like something out of a bad horror movie.

There were three long, and deep, gashes on the right side of Emily's face, they had an IV hooked up, and there was a machine beeping in the background.

"Oh Em." Leah said, going over to the bedside, and taking her hand.

"Leah?" Emily's voice was hoarse, like it hurt to talk.

"Yeah, I'm here. It's alright. Okay? You're going to be fine." _Please, she has to be._

"I know. They said everything would heal, but I was going to have the scars." She coughed, like the effort was hurting her.

"Shh. You don't have to talk." Leah patted her hand.

Even with all the blood and bruising and open flesh on her face Emily seemed to smile sadly.

"Sam was the one who found me." She said quietly.

"Oh." Was all Leah could think. "Well he'll probably start stalking your room, or something." Nobody had any idea how much effort Leah had to make to joke about things like this. "Now you'll never get rid of him." She almost even grinned at the end of it.

Emily's face turned to pleading now, and Leah suddenly couldn't quite breath right, and she had this instinct like she should run out of the room, like she needed to protect herself from something.

"I…I'm not going to Leah. He felt so bad, with what happened…with the bear. And we are going to try and make it work…" Emily kept going on about tragedy bringing people together, but all Leah could do was stare at her.

This person, her _family_ was betraying her. Emily had felt like a sister to her. All these nights, it was Emily who Leah sat with, it was _Emily _ who had brought her back trashy magazines to try and take her mind off things. It was _Emily_ who had seen, as close as anyone had, what Sam had done to her.

And now she was going to "try and make it work", seriously?

"…never want to hurt you, either of us, but…I think that we were meant to be."

Leah drew her hand back from Emily's, and resisted the urge she had to slap her across the face, seeing Emily's current condition.

"Congratulations." Leah said, sounding cold.

"Leah, please…" Emily said, somehow still managing to sound sincere. "Please don't hate me."

"Don't speak to me again. Don't look at me, don't…anything. You can go back home, or go with him or _whatever_. But absolutely, do not expect me to understand, to be _happy _for you." Leah's voice was quiet but shaking. "Because I'm not, and I sure as hell will never be."

Emily tried to open her mouth to say something, but she didn't get the chance, Leah was already walking out the door.

How much was one person supposed to have to take? Leah thought. If it was anyone else, _anyone _but Emily she might be able to understand, but…it was Emily. And now she had lost two people. The two people she never thought she would lose.

_At least it couldn't get any worse._

She walked out of Emily's room, and smack into someone else.

And…oh…of course…of course it was Sam.


	17. Chapter Sixteen

**A couple more chapters to go I believe - thanks for those of you who reviewed! Let me know what you think.**

**Chapter Sixteen**

He remembered it.

He was sitting on the beach, it was one of those days. The days that he felt more particularly that Emily refused to talk to him, that he had to lead a pack of _wolves_, what he had done to Leah.

He was sitting there, not really having the willpower to move, and he heard someone walking behind him.

He smelt her before he saw her.

He turned around, and they talked about…_something._

What was it they talked about? She said something, and then he said something…or was it the other way around.

He didn't know, only that it had ended in him attacking her.

_Attacking her._

The one person he couldn't live without.

Guilty didn't quite cover it at the moment.

He had phased back, luckily he had an extra pair of shorts on him, and he ran with her to the hospital.

"Please." He remembered yelling, approaching the ambulance entrance. "Please help her she was…she was attacked by a bear."

The paramedics took her and rushed her into the giant white building.

It was a couple of more hours until he was let into her room after that.

"Will you fill out some of her information." The efficient looking nurse with a hairy mole asked behind the desk. Well, ask probably isn't the appropriate word since it wasn't a question.

He got stumped halfway through the first question.

First name. _Emily_.

Last name. _Young_.

Middle initial…he didn't know her middle name, age, permanent residence…insurance information, if she smoked or not…and then on and so forth.

He realized how little he actually knew about Emily, how he, really, only knew her first and last name, and that she was Leah's cousin. And that was enough to make him sure he wanted to be with her forever.

Then he thought about how much he knew about Leah. How he knew everything about Leah, her middle name, how she got the scar right above her left elbow. Her favorite television show, how she only ate vegetables if they had massive amounts of salt on them. He knew Leah better then almost anyone. But it didn't matter.

In the end, the imprint made it not matter. She could do anything for him, she could be anyone, but since she wasn't Emily, it negated all the rest.

"Hon," A considerably more friendly nurse stuck her head around the corner. "She's alright to see you now, she's a little sleepy after the surgery, but awake."

"And…she's going to be okay?"

The nurse smiled. "Just some scaring, but she'll pull through alright. It's lucky you were there."

Lucky wasn't the word he was thinking of.

Sam walked in the room, thinking that if Emily didn't want to see him before, she really wasn't going to want to see him now.

And then he saw her face. What he had done to her face.

It was completely scared on the right side. They were deep, and they were permanent, but she still looked beautiful, to him, and he thought she probably always would.

"Hi." She said, her voice was quiet and she looked shy.

"I…I am so sorry." He voice cracked. "I don't…I don't even know what to say. There's no justifying what I did. I can't even…it could have been so much worse…and you must be wondering how I turned into…" He had to take a deep breath for this one, to tell the first person outside the elders and his pack that he was a wolf. "Into a wolf."

She nodded her head, he thought it probably hurt her to talk.

So her told her. Everything. About the first time he phased, how he was so alone, and it had hurt so badly, how he thought he had gone crazy. Then how Old Quil had told him he wasn't crazy, that he was a protector. He was a _leader_.

He told her how others had started to phase, how he had to lead them, even though he had no idea what he was doing.

Then he finally told her about imprinting. About the bond, and the strings, how he had known, right away, she was for him. How terrible he felt for hurting Leah, but in the end…

Emily was quiet through the whole thing, only nodding and listening.

"I saw you on the beach this morning." She said at last. "And you looked so…I just wanted to help. Because I didn't like you looking like that." She reached out to take his hand.

"But, how can you ever forgive me for what I did?"

"You didn't mean to, I can see now, you would never want to hurt me. I can forgive you Sam, I already have." She smiled, with the good side of her face. "But…are you going to be able to forgive yourself?"

He didn't answer, only smiled at her. "Who's going to tell her?" He said at last.

Emily didn't to ask who he meant. "Can I, please? She's my cousin, and I don't want her to find out the wrong way…" Emily stopped talking and looked concerned.

Sam didn't bother mentioning there would be no "right way" for something like this. "They called her." He said. "Or, the Clearwater's at least. I'll bet they'll be here soon."

They both agreed Sam should leave, then come back in a little bit, because Leah would not react kindly to him being in the room.

Sam went to the cafeteria, bought something that was _supposed _to be jell-o, then pushed it around for a half hour before dumping it into a garbage can, which was probably it's original home.

He thought that Leah had come and gone by now.

Sam was in such a hurry to get to Emily's room he probably wasn't watching as closely as he should where he was walking, and ended up running into someone right outside of her room.

He didn't even notice it was Leah until he had reached out to catch her elbow, instinctively.

She looked up and, before she had time to realize who it was, locked eyes with him. She jerked her elbow away, like he had shocked her.

"Sorry." He said, it was small, and covered so many things. And not enough.

He saw it in her eyes though, she knew. She knew about him and Emily. Because now there was a resentment in them that wasn't there before. There was a deeper level of emotion then just sadness, an extra coat of betrayal.

Leah locked her jaw and started to walk away from him.

He wanted to call out to her, to try and talk to her or something, but he had lost that right.

And Emily was waiting for him.


	18. Chapter Seventeen

**And herein is Leah's version of a downwards spiral. Review for another chapter update!**

**Chapter Seventeen**

She was angry, but it was a dull anger. The one that made you feel sick, the type that never really went away, and was a tangible, physical ache.

Sam had come over to the house, three days after the incident. He had come for Emily's stuff, which Leah had conveniently packed for her and left out on the front step. Sam having the nerve to come over, after everything he had done just added to that ache.

His head was bowed and Sue stood in the window watching him.

For once she hadn't tried to make Leah forgive Emily, she hadn't told Leah that she needed to "rise above". And somehow, that made Leah feel even worse.

She was exactly where she was before Emily and Sam decided to try and "make it work", except now she was down Emily as well.

The only person she was able to be with was, surprisingly, Seth. Because Seth didn't want to talk about it, he didn't try and make her feel better. He just let her be. Before this Leah had never really given Seth any credit, but behind the odor and gangly limbs and food stains, Seth was actually incredibly perceptive, something that made him a pretty good human being.

And Leah felt fairly certain Seth wasn't going to get involved with Emily or Sam.

Unless, of course, they tried to adopt him, which she wasn't entirely ruling out.

They would watch television, and Seth had the good sense to avoid shows with any romance what-so-ever. Leah would watch him play his video-station-360-cube or whatever the latest one was called.

And sometimes, to really kick it up, they went for a walk on the beach.

"Nice day out." Seth would remark, not even looking up from the screen.

Leah would nod her head. "Yup." She would say sometimes.

Then one way or another they would end up walking down to the beach, turning around when it felt like it was time.

That's what they were doing that day. It was one of those February mornings where it seemed warmer then it should be. Where it was just a teasing of a long away spring. But they figured they may as well take advantage of it.

There was someone else on the beach that day though.

Leah recognized him. Smokey, she thought his name was. Or at least his nickname. It was pretty obvious how he got it, his eyes were the color of smoke, and something about him made him seem like he had this…haze covering all his features.

The word was he never had a dad, or a mom, just raised himself out of the woods, rose above it all to come out, just like smoke.

Leah though he was in…he was two years older then her, and had a reputation for selling things other than cookies.

He also had a reputation for pulling other people, usually younger kids, into his mess.

"Hey-o." He called over to them. His voice was low, and coarser before his time. His eyes looked half asleep. He had on a thick leather coat and jeans with the knees out, and for some ungodly reason, was barefoot.

They both ignored him, heads down, and kept on walking.

"Must not have heard me." He said, somehow ending up in front of them. "I said hello." His breath stank of alcohol, and something that Leah couldn't exactly place but just _smelled _illegal.

"Hi." She said shortly, putting her hand on Seth's elbow, trying to tug him over to the side.

Smokey stepped in front of him and Leah, seeing where this was quickly going, moved Seth slightly behind her.

"I recognize you. You's that Clearwater boy." He squinted. "I bet you're a good kid, huh? Yup, I see that. But I bet you could use a little more money at home. Huh uh, nope, can't say no to that. Well I can help you with that one…"

"He's alright. We're fine." Leah said, her voice was clipped, and she narrowed her eyes.

"Hey, baby, this ain't about you. Huh uh, I had my eyes on this boy for a while. People won't be looking at him to cause trouble. Huh uh, I need him, and you stay out of it, or you'll make both you and your brother sorry."

"_Sorry_? Is that supposed to be a threat?" She crossed her arms. Leah didn't really get into any fights, but she wouldn't turn one down right now. She was just reckless enough to not care it was with a dealer, and someone who probably carried.

"Huh uh, baby, it's the truth."

"Back off. Because I am sure as fuck not scared of you and your sorry ass. You think it takes a big guy to boss around _kids_ all day long, cause I know younger people that do that and they are called _babysitters_, usually fourteen and girls. And I'm not any more scared of you than I am of them."

This time Smokey narrowed his eyes.

"Leah." Seth pleaded. He put his hand on her shoulder, more restraining than anything.

"Say that again bitch, and you'll regret it."

"I don't think I will." Leah's chin stuck out.

Smokey flashed something out of his pocket, it was a knife.

Leah felt Seth stiffen beside her, she had to get him out of here at least.

She started walking backwards, without taking her eyes off of Smokey.

"This ain't over!" He hollered.

Leah only smiled, one that didn't reach her eyes.

"Are you out of your _friggin'_ mind?" He asked her, sounding outraged. He kept fidgeting with his hands, and his eyes were bulging, they were walking home, and Seth was barely keeping from jogging.

"Relax Seth, nothing happened, just stay away from him, and I will take care of it, alright?"

"Do you _hear _yourself? Are you actually _insane_? Huh, do you have a friggin' death wish or something?"

"Do you hear _yourself_? You sound like a girl. I am just going chat with Smokey tonight, and get things squared away."

"Who the hell do you think you are? Walker Texas friggin' Ranger?" Leave it to Seth to watch the dorkiest show ever.

Leah rolled her eyes again. "Yeah, I'm having that identity crisis."

"Well, _chat_ _with Smokey_, how are you even going to find him."

"He hangs at Down and About at night, I'll just find the party and go there."

Down and About was the dingiest row of houses on the Rez, and where the cops usually got called. Leah didn't really know what she was thinking, but that this was the first time it wasn't of Sam in months. And that she liked that.

Leah wasn't really sure how to get dressed for that night, so she decided on a coat and jeans, with a black tank top underneath. She almost considered bringing a knife, but the only reason she got Seth to keep his mouth shut was because she promised him she wouldn't.

So Leah waited for everyone to go to sleep that night, then snuck out her bedroom window. Blocking other memories _that _drudged up.

She showed up at the houses with her hands in her pockets, there were only lights on in one of them, and music was coming out of it.

Leah guess that was where the party was at.

She went on in, feeling that nobody there would be in a state to care if she

knocked of not.

There was a guy passed on the floor in front of her, she stepped over him.

Another was on the couch, holding a needle to his arm, and looking up at the ceiling. The one next to him had a half empty bottle and looked by far the soberest.

"Hey," She said, sitting next to him. "You know Smokey?"

The guy looked at her blankly, but nodded his head.

"He here?"

He shook his head slowly from side to side indicating no. "He gone up to the other Rez. Had to…stay…cool…for a while." The guy smiled and laughed twice, he sounded hollow.

She frowned. He would probably be…"staying cool" for a while then.

"I got what he got." The guy finally whispered. And held out a little bag filled with yellow pills. "And you don't even have to pay for 'em. This time."

Leah had never done drugs, she wasn't a goody-goody exactly, she had just always thought they were a waste of time.

That was when she had other things to do, and other people who cared for her.

She popped a couple of the pills, and let her brain shut off.

The guy next to her put his hand on her thigh and began to rub it up and down.

Leah debated about how far she would let him get, not all the way. No, not tonight, at least. But enough so his pants would feel a little tighter when they were done.

Leah came back there the next night, and the next night.

Her parents didn't notice, they were always going to Seattle now, and Seth didn't know what to do about it, how to stop her.

Since she was a well rounded individual she tried a little bit of everything.

There were the needles, Leah used to not like needles, but now she had no aversion to them.

There was the drinking, which she did every night, a good way to start up with was a couple of shots.

There was also the snorting, which she couldn't do all the time, since it was too obvious and Seth had no idea how deep in she was. But with the needles she could wear long sleeves.

Oh, and there was the smoking, which hardly seemed mentionable compared to the rest.

She had heard that drugs were expensive, that it was a pricey hobby. She, however, used methods other than money.

She learned that these guys didn't need to go all the way to be happy, because they were usually passed out before then.

But she could rub up against them, and straddle on their laps to get off a couple extra hits, and she always emptied their cigarette cartons before leaving them in the bedroom/living room/bathroom/kitchen she was currently in.

Those nights she never thought of Sam, well almost never. There was always that hurt, always. It never went away.

Before the boys, and the drugs and the drinking Leah remembered the first, and last, time Sue broached that topic with her.

"It comes in waves Leah, you just need to learn to ride it out." Sue had told her.

But no, not for Leah, it didn't come in waves, it was constant. It was all the time there, it wasn't lessening and it wasn't receding. But it was a little _duller _when she was under something, or someone.

That night hadn't really begun, it was the end of May, though Leah didn't know it. She had already been through about five smokes, and half a bottle of what she _thought_ was a vodka-whiskey mix. When _he _came.

Leah thought she was hallucinating, it wouldn't have been the first time.

She blinked but he didn't leave, he only came closer.

_Oh shit._


	19. Chapter Eighteen

**I will update soon...maybe later today if I get some reviews... :)**

**Chapter Eighteen**

Sam could breath a little easier now. He had Emily, he had the pack, somewhat under control, except for Jacob. And Emily's wounds had finally scarred over.

He had even got the local drug loser, Smokey who had been in his own grade, to leave the Rez, something he had been working on since winter.

But there was that little spot, that little black spot of guilt.

He didn't want Emily to see that, because he knew she felt badly enough, he knew that it sort of killed her inside that Leah refused to talk to her, and had promptly kicked her out of the house.

But that was the one thing that Sam couldn't do for Emily, to make Leah forgive her. And it was another thing that Sam _had _done, split them apart.

He and Emily had moved into a small house, that they had bought. They painted the outside, and got some cozy furniture for the inside. Sam thought it was small but Emily only said it was "Perfect, just perfect."

The pack regularly hung out there, indulging themselves in Emily's cooking, and she didn't seem to mind.

So, Sam's only _active _problem was Jacob, and Bella Swan. At first Sam had forbidden any member of the pack to say anything to anyone. But Jacob had found a way around that, and now Bella was hanging out here, at the Rez, and had brought a redhead bloodsucker with her.

Excellent, well done Jacob.

But, as it turns out, those problems took the back seat one night when Seth came knocking on their front door.

Sam had known, right away, that it wasn't one of the pack members, they would have just come in, asking what there was to eat.

Emily got to the door before he could.

"Seth!" She said, sounding happy, and surprised.

He gave her a closed lip smile, not cruel, but not really cousinly either.

"Sam." He said, looking past Emily. "Can I, um…talk to you? For a minute?"

"Sure." He said, smiling at Emily, and stepping out on the front deck. "What's up Seth?" He had to admit he was curious.

"It's Leah." The words came out quickly. "I know she would _kill _me if she knew I was here, but my parents aren't home, and I don't know who else to go to, she won't listen to me, and I thought it was a phase, to get Smokey or something, but it's been going on for _months_ now and she won't stop…"

"Hold up. Slow down, what's happening?"

And Seth filled him in, with the day on the beach with Smokey, and Leah's new…habits.

"She's there now." Seth finished. "I'm worried…I think she might be trying to kill herself or something." And Seth did look terrified, like he felt physically sick.

"At Down and About?" Sam checked, Seth nodded and he was on his way. "Go back home, and I'll be there soon."

It only took him about ten minutes running to find the house where Leah was.

She was nearly passed on out the couch in the main room when he got there, and he almost didn't recognize her. She looked like the shell of a person, nothing like the girl he used to know.

Her head was lolled back, and she was looking at the ceiling.

There was a guy next to her, working on the buttons on her jeans.

Leah looked like she noticed him, but was waiting for something, before she swatted his hand away. There was an unused needle on the table next to her, and a band tied around her arm.

Something about it made Sam want to scream, want to weep. Because he knew, he _knew_ it was his fault she was here. That he had pushed her to this.

"Leah?" He said.

She turned her head to look at him, but didn't lift it up.

_Oh Leah. _He thought.


	20. Chapter Nineteen

**Something wolfy this way comes…!**

**Chapter Nineteen**

When Leah realized that he was not a hallucination, that Sam was indeed standing in the living room of…well she wasn't exactly sure whose house she was at, but that _he _was there, she really, really wanted a cigarette.

Leah's mind seem to shut off, it must have, otherwise Sam would have never gotten away with scooping her up in his arms, and carrying her all the way to her house.

It wasn't until she saw the front door, about forty feet in the distance, that she got a hold of herself.

"Put me down." She said quietly, starting to shake.

"I don't know if you can walk." He was whispering too, for some reason.

But it wasn't walking Leah was concerned about, it was breathing. Because she felt like she was going to suffocate in his arms. Like she was only getting a small taste of a large meal, one she used to have a lot, and now would never get again. And she was starving.

"I mean it, put me _down_." She ended up yelling the last part, and Sam promptly set her on the ground.

Leah took a few steps away from him, stumbling only slightly. Sam stuck out his arm, as if to balance her.

"Don't." She snarled.

Leah looked like a mess, her hair was disheveled, and she still had the band around her arm, her pants button was undone, and there was that empty look to her eyes. But now her chest was heaving, and her arms were shaking.

Sam didn't think it had anything to do with her earlier…situation.

"Leah, what are you doing?" He asked finally. "This isn't…this isn't you. You don't do shit this stupid."

"You don't really know me anymore Sam." She spat out. "And you lost the right, to give your opinion on what I do with my life. How did you know where I was anyway?"

Sam was silent a beat too long.

Leah shook her head, muttering her brother's name under her breath, along with something that sounded like "kill".

"I know." He said, answering what she had said earlier.

"So then why don't you just leave me the hell alone. I'll leave you and Emily to your business." Leah had to take a breath to continue. "And you do the same for me, alright?"

"I just don't want you to hurt yourself Lee-lee." The name slipped off his tongue, he said it without thinking, but regretted it instantly, when he saw her flinch.

"This is not hurting." She said, pointing at herself. "And, besides, there's not a damn thing you can do to stop me." Leah was really losing it. She was shaking, and looked like she was sweating.

By that time Seth had come out of the house, he too was shaking and sweating, Sam frowned, something was wrong…

Nobody had notice, too engrossed with Sam and Leah, that the Clearwaters's had pulled back into the driveway.

Harry got out of the car, with Sue helping him. They looked at each other.

"Oh dear." Sue said under her breath.

"Seriously Sam, just leave, right now." Leah had a hard time finishing the sentence, a spasm took her whole body.

"Leah!" Seth cried out, his own body shaking at this point.

It was hard to say, both Sue and Sam would agree, what the order of events were, that happened next.

All of the sudden there was a gray wolf, joined by a sandy one, howling and running into the woods,

Harry was clutching at his heart, and collapsing to the ground, Sue yelled, not exactly knowing where to run, who to help.

Her and Sam's eyes met for a second, long enough to communicate that Sam would take care of Leah and Seth.

He phased, and a chorus of shouts erupted into his head.

_She's a girl. _Very good Embry.

_ What, a fucking girl? _Thanks very much for that Jacob.

_ Seth…and his sister, what the hell's happening Sam? _

_ I…I don't know. _Sam told Jared truthfully. Also feeling a little relieved that Paul wasn't there to add his two cents in.

_What's happening? _This time Sam recognized Seth's voice, and saw through his thoughts that Leah was running in front of him, her brain was more of a whirl then one coherent thought.

_It's going to be alright, Seth, Leah, I promise. You know the legends, and, well, to shorten the story they are true… _Except for Leah, no fucking clue what happened there, Sam resisted from adding, because there had never _been _a female werewolf. Ever. Never.

_Just try to calm down, and stop running. _Because Sam, and the rest of the pack trying to join him, were having a hard time catching up to Leah's pace. Though, of course none them would admit _that. _

_ Please. _He said. _The quicker you can control what you're feeling the quicker we can get to finding out what happened to your dad…_

_What happened to Dad? _It was the first coherent thought that Leah had had since phasing.

Fuck. Sam thought, she hadn't seen what had happened to Harry. Leah, he could feel, was watching the memory play out in her mind, and he felt a stab of her pain.

_ What's friggin' going on?_ Seth whined. He had stopped running, and Leah was only a couple of hundred feet in front on him, Sam and the rest of the pack had almost caught up.

They skidded to a stop, Seth was hyperventilating about as much as a wolf could.

_Guys._ Sam nodded to them, and they circled around Seth.

_Seth, buddy, it's going to be alright… _Jacob started.

Sam knew he was going to have to try and take care of Leah by himself.

She was snarling at him from a distance. She looked like a trapped animal, like she was scared and not willing to show it.

Leah snapped at him twice, and flicked her tail agitatedly . She was turned away, refusing to look at him.

_Leah please…_ Sam didn't really know where to go with this. Although other pack members had phased, none of them had been his ex-girlfriend.

_So I can hear you…in my fucking head. And you…you can see my thoughts? _The last part of her question sounded horrified. And Sam could imagine it was.

Nobody in the pack really _liked _the rest of their minds being open to everyone, but to someone who always kept their thoughts and feelings so closely guarded like Leah had…it would be a nightmare.

And then her mind was whirling again. Going to fast for one thought.

This was where he disappeared for those two weeks…why he looked so different. Where he was always disappearing to. And Emily…did this have something to do with him…and Emily.

Then the rest of it all started to click. Why Seth had been acting so funny the past few days, and even she could notice. Why she had been feeling so different.

Of course, since her parents were never home anymore neither of them noticed.

Her parents…

_And my dad? Is he alright?_

_I don't know. _He told her truthfully. _But the faster you can control yourself, the faster we can find out._

_How long does this…last? Am I going to be like this forever?_

_ You stop aging. _He admitted. _But eventually, when our people don't need us anymore, and we have better control we can stop phasing._

_ Goody. Well, I'm going home to try and…phase. _

She, still without looking at Sam, began to run home.

Something shot across her brain, before she could stop it, and Sam flinched. He started, as if to follow after her.

_You don't need to come with._

Leah disappeared into the forest, the rest of the packs heads snapped up. Nobody had ever _left_ so soon after becoming a wolf, they had all needed support, all needed help trying to adjust.

Basically, they had needed Sam.

But Leah had seen just where that need would get her.

**So, also in this chapter, there's my own explanation of why Leah phased; the drugs screwed her brain/body up enough, and at the same timing where one would theoretically begin to phase and BAM, the creation of a she-wolf. **


	21. Chapter Twenty

**Closer to the ending! Let me know! **

**Chapter Twenty**

It took Seth about three more hours than Leah for him to phase back. The pack helped him get to the hospital, where a teary Sue and stony Leah sat in the waiting room.

Harry had a severe heart attack, they were told.

Leah was shocked, and Sue only grimaced.

"It's why we always went to Seattle." Sue admitted. "We were seeing if anything could be done…he had a weak heart. He didn't want to worry…you kids."

_You._ Leah knew Sue meant, he didn't want to add anything else to Leah's plate. So instead of being there for her dad, she was getting wasted and high every night.

The rest of the pack came running in the ER, looking slightly ridiculous and cartoon-ish, since it was five enormous males in cutoff blue jean shorts.

"Is dad…is he gonna be alright?" Seth asked, he looked freaked. And, although Leah hadn't noticed how much he had grew over the past couple weeks and was nearly as tall as Sam, like a scared little kid.

"They don't know." Leah answered for her mom.

Although Leah had been in the pack for a grand total of three hours and sixteen minutes, she thought that their presence was supposed to bring a sense of belonging.

That she was supposed to feel like these were her brothers, her people.

But all she could think of was Sam.

How he had kept this from her, and now she realized, how her father must have as well, because he was on the council, he must have known. And that was why he didn't want her to see him anymore. To protect her.

But protect her from what? Her dad didn't seriously think Sam would attack her did he? Like Emily was attacked…and Sam had probably done that too. Leah guessed.

Emily…something tugged at her memory. Something in the legends…imprinting. Sam had _imprinted_ on Emily. On her freaking cousin, because she really, honest to god, wasn't the person he was meant to be with.

She thought she was going to be sick, with all of this understanding. Because now she couldn't blame Emily or Sam for it. Because it really wasn't anyone's fault, it really _was _something that had just happened.

"Excuse me?" A stern looking doctor came from around the corner. "?" He looked at Sue, and Sue nodded, standing up, she kept a hold of both Leah's and Seth's hands. "I'm sorry, we did everything we could…"

Snap. Leah felt like she could practically hear another part of herself falling away. Just another piece she could never get back.


	22. Chapter Twenty One

**One more chapt then the epilogue after this!**

**Chapter Twenty-One**

They had the funeral a couple of days later, and the whole reservation had showed up, on account of Harry was one of the elders.

The pack came too, they were all in black and wearing suits.

Seth, Sue and Leah all stood closest to the coffin. This time Sue, as well as Leah, was looking stoic. Seth was the only one with emotion on his face.

The whole thing went by in sort of a blur.

Then came the part Leah had been dreading, everyone lined up to give the Clearwater's their condolences. There were two people in particular that Leah didn't want to see.

"I'm so sorry Leah." Emily said, when it was her turn. Leah fixed her gaze on the air above Emily's head, it was hard for her to see the scars, now that she knew how Emily got them.

"Thanks." Leah barely managed to get out.

"If you need anything…if you ever need something…well don't be a stranger alright?" Emily said, making everything worse by looking genuine.

"Thanks." Leah said again.

Then it was Sam, the one person she didn't want to touch more than Emily.

Sam gave her an awkward, one sided, hug.

Leah's chest seized, she had realized earlier…but it was worse now, in this close proximity, the only thing she should have to deal with today was he dad, but now she had _this_, Sam, too…

"I'm so sorry Leah." He said. And she couldn't even manage to open her mouth. Leah bobbed her head up and down, to what she thought was a nod.

Sam, thankfully, moved on quickly.

Seth reached over and squeezed her hand, and Leah managed a smile for him. She would protect him, it was her new promise, whatever happened she wouldn't lose Seth too, because that one, she wouldn't be able to handle. That would be the final straw.

The rest of the funeral finally ended, and Leah found herself up in her room, alone, and looking at her plain black high heels.

The drinking and the drugs would have to end, she realized. Because she didn't think they would really give her that numbness they did when she was a human. When she was normal.

Seth, after the funeral, disappeared for a couple of days, finally letting himself phase back and forth, she knew how hard it was for him to keep it together at the funeral.

She however, refused. She wouldn't phase unless she wanted to, and she didn't want to.

All the guys thought she was being a pain, already. But Leah had to figure some things out.

She thought of her brain as a painting. It was miserable and ugly and painful, and not something she wanted anyone to see. But they could read her thoughts, and she couldn't ever think about Sam, as…her Sam. So she would cover it up, she decided.

She was going to paint over the old picture with layers of bitterness and anger, and she was going to be a bitch. It would be easy, it would be effective, and she really didn't care if her "pack" or whatever liked her. Because she sure as hell didn't like them.

Would she fight to the death for them, sure, but get along with them, not a chance.

When she had this finally planned out, she decided it was safe to phase.

There were a bunch of voices in her head at once, and it made her cringe.

_Where have you been?_

_ Leah! _That one was obviously Seth, because he was the only one who sounded the least bit happy.

_About fucking time. _Paul. _Just because you're a vag, doesn't mean you get special treatment._

_Whatever. _She thought.

And then something else occurred to her. She hadn't gotten her period since…she actually didn't remember…she counted back the months, but the last person she had…was with Sam, and that wasn't for…so she wasn't…but did that mean she was _infertile._

_ Whoa, enough of that type of shit, sorry I don't do 'period'. _

_ Paul, enough. _Oh good, she was glad Sam was here for this.

Her first time phasing, and she was already failing at hiding her thoughts.

_Leah, _She could hear the awkwardness of his tone from here. _This might be…normal, since we stop aging, you might…er…stop…um…as well. I'm not sure since you're the only, female werewolf._

_ Right, well it's not a big deal._

Paul snorted.

_Anyway, we need to have a meeting, Seth, Leah can you guys handle phasing back? We'll go to my place._

One by one the voices started phasing out, until it was just Leah and Seth.

_His place? As in his and Emily's place? _Leah couldn't help but ask, since it was only Seth.

_I'm sorry, Leah. _He didn't know what else he could say.

Then it was just her.

Leah ran home, to grab some clothes, and then made her way slowly down to Sam's house.

Her heart thudded to a stop when she saw it. Dark green. That's what Emily had painted it. _Fuck my life_.

And for a second, for one painful heart aching second Leah saw it. She saw herself, standing on the doorstep, ten years older, shooing two kids out of the house, one's a boy and the other's a girl, they both have long black hair and laughter lines circling their face. Sam would come behind her, securing his arm around her waist…but no, that would never happen. It was never going to happen.

She made her way inside, where she smelled a nauseously good aroma from the kitchen. Muffins, she thought.

Emily was laughing, and swatting at the boy's hands maternally.

They all stopped, most of them with their mouths full, when Leah entered the room.

"Leah." Emily said, sounding happy. She went over and hugged her cousin, Leah moved her hand awkwardly around Emily's back, and looked at the ceiling.

After another twenty minutes of inhaling food, all of which Leah said she was "Fine, just fine, thanks." Sam finally showed up.

Leah was relieved, thinking that sooner this started the sooner this ended, but she had forgotten about the shit in the middle.

Like Sam going over to Emily, putting on hand on her waist, and another on the small of her back. Like him pulling her close, right up to his face and smiling, then kissing the beginning point of each scar. It looked like something they did everyday, and thought they would do everyday.

It sent a crack down in Leah. She had known they were together, but she had yet to get to see the beauty of their love. Oh please.

Sam seemed to remember himself, and called everyone into the living room.

The meeting was exactly what Leah thought it would be.

Sam talked about all the legends, and their responsibilities as protectors, he talked about the treaty they had with the Cullens, and she noticed how stony Jacob's face got. She was going to have to remember that, Cullens were a soft spot for him, a weakness.

He made a brief mention about how Leah was their first sister.

And Leah, realized for the first time, what being a werewolf meant.

She was, for a long time into the future, going to be in Sam's head. Have a bunch of asshole guys in hers. She was going to have to come over to Sam's house, be around his and Emily's love fest.

She was going to have to give up, as she recently learned, having kids, she was giving up her entire life.

And that feeling, the one she had let Sam see the first night she phase by accident, washed over her again. Blame.

Because everything, everything could be traced back to Sam.

She was damaged, when he left her for Emily.

She tried to drown that out with the drinking and the drugs, which is probably messed her up enough to activate the werewolf gene in the first place.

She _killed her father_, because Sam had pushed her far enough to phase in front of him, causing him to literally have a heart attack.

Leah stood up, she had to get out of there.

"Leah, where are you going?" Sam asked her, everyone looked her direction, nobody, really nobody, had ever left a meeting early.

"Sam," If she was going to become a bitter harpy bitch, she may as well go for it, starting now. "I've known since we started having sex how much you like the sound of your own voice, so I'm out."

She turned on her heel, hearing everyone's jaw hitting the floor.

But Leah couldn't care, all she could think about was how trapped she felt, how before she had chosen to stay on the Rez, but now she would never be able to leave.


	23. Chapter Twenty Two

**FINAL CHAPTER. All that's left is the epilogue. Review please. And can anyone guess the ending? There are (very) subtle hints about where this one is going. :)**

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

Nobody liked having Leah in the pack, it was as simple as that. She complained, she thought of everything the other guys were polite enough not to.

She deliberately picked fights, she never cooperated.

And Sam always took her side, always. He always stood up for her, told everyone else to layoff.

Because he knew that she thought it was his fault she was there in the first place, and he couldn't help but agree with her.

And it was his fault she was like this in the first place, nobody else saw it was something she was hiding behind, that she was just putting up her old walls so nobody saw how much she was hurting.

And he felt guilty, all of the time.

He was never alone with Leah, she had made sure of that, when picking patrols, when she was forced to come over to his house. Sam doubted that he would ever see her alone again, until she showed up at the house one day, he knew it was her, because she was the only one that knocked.

"Leah?" He said, opening the door, he was a little surprised, and a little worried.

"Yeah. Hi." She waved, by lifting her hand up, then let it drop by her side. "I just…I um, have something to give to you…back. To give _back_ to you."

She shoved a small box at him. Sam didn't recognize the box, but he did recognize the necklace inside it.

It felt like hundreds of years had passed since he had given it to her, but he realized, it was only one. And almost exactly to the day.

"But…Leah this was a present. I wanted you…want you to keep it."

"I just think…" She faltered, annoyed with herself, she had this all planned out, she was supposed to be cool and detached. She wasn't supposed to stutter, to falter. "I think that it would be more appropriate, if Emily had it. All things considering. It was a family thing, so you should keep it in the family."

Something about that left Sam speechless. Something about Leah not thinking of herself in his family…he realized how much everything had changed. All the promises he had broken felt more tangible.

He had seen Leah's memories of him, and he had the same ones. But it hurt him, to see all the emotion she still had attached to them, emotion he felt like belonged to someone else.

"Alright then." He said finally.

Leah didn't say anything else, she just turned and walked away, leaving Sam with the necklace.

Although Leah didn't really know what Sam was going to do with the necklace, it killed a little piece of her to see it around Emily's neck at the next meeting.

Sam, on the other hand, couldn't quite work it up to explain to Leah that Emily had found it and assumed it was for her, how he couldn't set her straight. But he sort of wish he would have warned her when he saw the spasm across Leah's face when she saw the thing on Emily's neck.

They were over. He realized then. They were really over. He had, once again, picked Emily over Leah. And he always would, no matter how minor it was, and no matter how much he wish it didn't have to be like that.

It was like that, because he loved Emily more. It was out of his control, but that's the way it was.

And it was just a heartbreaking thing to see that realization cross Leah's face as well, not that anyone noticed.


	24. Chapter Epilogue

**Finally done! Thanks to everyone, check my A/N at the end :)**

**Epilogue**

It was finally over. Finally.

The Volturi had left, and they had won.

Jake had left Sam's pack, and Leah and Seth had joined him.

But now that the two packs weren't needed Jake was going to join up with Sam again, and there would be two alphas, sort of.

And that was not something Leah could handle.

She had talked it over with Jacob, and he was letting her leave.

Leah shared about as much with him as she would let herself allow, she had only lied a little bit, about how she wanted Sam to be happy, how she had grown. Or whatever.

Now he had _Nessie_, and a new family, and he was letting her go. Leah was going to California, because she had always wanted to see a beach that didn't have rocks on it. Because she wanted to be warm because of the sun, and not her genes.

Because she couldn't handle going back to Sam, not after she had finally left.

It was still bad, really bad, the hurting, but it was really, really bad _with _Sam. And she would take however much clemency she could get.

And it didn't hurt that she was leaving before his wedding, where she had agreed to be a bridesmaid at. _A fucking bridesmaid_. Seriously. His _August _wedding.

So Jacob was letting her leave, but it wasn't that easy for Sam.

He didn't know what possessed him, looking back, what _made_ him go over to Leah's house on the day she was leaving, and ask her to stay, to try and make her stay.

She looked shocked to see him, legitimately eyes budging shocked, she was on her way out of the house, suitcase in hand, Seth was behind the wheel, laying on the horn, he was giving her a ride to the airport. _Honk. Ho-_ he saw Sam and stopped mid honk.

"You can't go." He said simply. He tried to ask her to stay.

"What about Seth, and you mom, what will they do without you?" He tried to guilt her into it.

"I could ask Jacob to command you to…" He tried to threaten her.

"Don't you dare." And he saw something dangerous flash in her eyes, so he switched to reasoning.

"Please Leah, you belong here. It's your home. I know…I know that I've been terrible. That what I did to you was unforgivable…"

"Sam…" Leah tried to interrupt, but he wouldn't be stopped.

"But you'll meet someone else."

"_Sam…_"

"Even if you don't think you will, you will. Because you deserve to be happy, Leah. You might even imprint, I know you don't think a lot of imprinting, but you might and then you'll see how…powerful it is. And you might be able to forgive me."

Because that was what he wanted, he wanted Leah to imprint and be happy, for him to not have to see that reminder, or know it was out there, of the type of pain he was capable of causing. How he was able to destroy.

"I don't think that'll happen…" She was getting annoyed, he wasn't getting out of her way and he was talking about things he didn't know anything about.

"But you never know, I bet it will, but you're more likely to imprint here Leah. On one of your own people."

"Sam just shut up!" She yelled, even that couldn't stop him.

"But Leah, you'll imprint here if anywhere, so I don't think you should leave, and thrown you chances of happiness out the window."  
>"Goddamnit, <em>Sam<em>, the reason I know I'm not going to imprint is because I did al-fucking-ready? Alright?"

"What?" He looked shocked. "Who?"

Her face broke. "You." She said, with a sense of finality. Leah looked over Sam's shoulder to Seth. His eyes were wide, and his mouth was opened.

_Fuck._ She thought, knowing he had heard.

"That's why I have to go, alright? Why it killing me to be here. My mom and Seth…they understand, sort of. It's all taken care of. Just let me leave, please." Her voice cracked and Sam just stepped out of the way stupidly. She pulled her suitcase behind her and made her way to the car.

"Leah…" Seth said when she got in the car. "I had…we…nobody…you didn't say anything."

"It wouldn't have done any good." She said. "Let's just get out of here, okay?" She turned to face out the windshield, avoiding Seth's stare, and didn't look back.

But if she would have she would have seen Sam on her step, still not moving.

Those months that Emily wouldn't talk to him were the worst of his life. Not having your imprint speak to you was like…it was indescribable.

And all this time, he had been putting Leah through the same thing, except so much worse. So much worse because there was _no _chance that they would be together.

All this time she was hiding it from everyone, and dealing with everyone hating her…

He saw her back, and her getting into the car, and it triggered a new memory.

_ It was one of those days. The days that he felt more particularly that Emily refused to talk to him, that he had to lead a pack of wolves, what he had done to Leah._

_ He was sitting there, not really having the willpower to move, and he heard someone walking behind him._

_ He smelt her before he saw her._

_ He turned around._

_ "Sam, are you alright?" She said, looking unsure. _

_ And from there it happened quickly, so quickly. _

_ "Sam…?" He was shaking, he couldn't even yell out for her to move back._

_ He phased and his paw swiped her before he had the chance to move. _

And he remembered what he saw, when Emily was walking towards him.

It was Leah, for that one second he saw Leah, he saw her and he forgot about Emily. He felt how much he had hurt Leah, and it was enough to make him attack Emily, to attack his imprint.

For Leah it always led back to Sam.

And Sam, for the first time, that even though it shouldn't, even though he had Emily, for him, it always led back to Leah.

Although it should have been, it just wasn't enough. It just didn't change things.

**At long last! Thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed this, and stuck with the story! **

**About the ending. Yes, I know that it's sort of...melancholy. But I wanted to do something realistic, not so deux ex machina. And, I wanted Leah to be independent, not fall into the arms of some other dude. And the "reason" Sam attacked Leah, I came up with that. As far as I know SM has not given a reason. **

**And, sorry, I'm bragging a little, but who caught that the title "An Imprint Story", ain't talking about Sam imprinting on Emily? Huh? ;) Ohh yeah. **


End file.
